tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61948485068352638612024-02-19T04:28:14.727-08:00The Missionary-ish Tales of Reagan TaylorReagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.comBlogger101125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-39394703882932734022016-01-24T09:30:00.000-08:002016-01-24T09:39:25.197-08:00For the Thai Food-Craving Rumbly in Your Tumbly<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Greetings, friends and family! I thought 6 months later was a good point in time to throw another blog up here. And one that is relevant to the lives of us all.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">People often ask me what kinds of food I eat out here in the Land of Smiles. (They don't ever call it that when they ask, but you know.) So I decided to compile a list of some of my favorites + some of what probably should be my favorites because of how popular/traditional they are. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Let it be known that I am neither a food connoisseur nor an aspiring food blogger, so when I use words like </span><i style="font-family: inherit;">limey</i><span style="font-family: inherit;"> and </span><i style="font-family: inherit;">spicy</i><span style="font-family: inherit;"> and </span><i style="font-family: inherit;">yummy </i><span style="font-family: inherit;">and can't really think of anything else to say... suffice it to say that the food is delicious, and that's why it's on this list. And for the items with little or no description at all: use your imagination, or Google :-). (Mark Wiens at <a href="http://migrationology.com/">migrationology.com</a></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"> has a great list of <a href="http://migrationology.com/2010/03/100-best-thai-dishes-to-eat-in-bangkok-ultimate-eating-guide/">100 Thai dishes to eat in Bangkok</a> - many of the dishes I have here are on his list as well!)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The format for the name of each food is as follows:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span><b style="font-family: inherit;">Thai script name</b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b> Phonetic pronunciation</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b> English description</b></span><br />
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Try some of these out for yourself, and let me know what you think!<br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;">Salads:</span></b><br />
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<b>ส้มตำ</b></div>
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<b>Som tam</b></div>
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<b>Green papaya salad</b></div>
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This dish comes in many different varieties, but I prefer it without the seafood. It is fresh, limey, and can be very spicy. Eat with sticky rice!</div>
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<b>ยำวุ้นเส้น</b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">Yam woon sen</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Glass noodles salad</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Another fresh-tasting dish that won't leave you feeling heavy. A great lime flavor, and also spicy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><b>Veggies: </b></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>ผักบุ้งไฟแดง</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Phat phak bung fai daeng</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Stir-fried morning glory</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><b>Soups & Curries:</b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>ก๋วยเตี๋ยว</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Guay tiao</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Noodle soup</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">One of my favorites, and a dish that is extremely versatile as far as the type of noodle and meat you can order. </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">For extra yumminess (and a tangy & spicy flavor), ask them to put in <i>tom yum</i> (</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">ต้มยำ,</span><b style="font-family: inherit;"> </b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">hot and sour flavor)</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;"> and <i>kiao</i> (</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">เกี๊ยว,</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: arial, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;">dumplings).</span></div>
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<b>แกงเขียวหวาน</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Gaeng kheow wan</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Green curry</b></span></div>
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<b>แกงส้มชะอม</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Gaeng som cha om</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Sour orange curry (with egg & veggie omelette)</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I normally have them put in shrimp, but you can choose any meat.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>ต้มยำ</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Tom yam</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Hot and sour soup</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">One of my very favorite dishes. Spicy and shrimp are standard, but you can ask them to tone down the spicy level, and chicken and pork are also delicious.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>ต้มข่าไก่</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Tom kha gai</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Coconut chicken soup</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Another favorite. Very creamy and not spicy. Eat with rice.</span></div>
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<b>แกงพะแนง</b></div>
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<b>Gaeng panang</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Panang curry</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><b>Noodle Dishes:</b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>สุกี้แห้ง</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Suki haeng</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Stir-fried noodles, veggies, and meat in a spicy, sour sauce. The dry version of <i>suki nam</i>, which is a soup adapted from Japanese hot pot. </span></div>
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<b>ผัดไทย</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Phat Thai</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The sweet, peanuty noodle dish everyone loves. </span></div>
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<a href="http://www.realthairecipes.com/wp-content/uploads/pad-see-ew-muu1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" src="http://www.realthairecipes.com/wp-content/uploads/pad-see-ew-muu1.jpg" height="236" width="400" /></span></a><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></span></div>
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<b>ผัดซีอิ้ว</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Phat see ew</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Soy sauce fried noodles</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Basically, just like it sounds. Not a spicy dish on its own, but it tastes great with fish sauce and pepper.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: x-large;"><b>Gap Khao (Food to Eat with Rice) Dishes:</b></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.alwaysfoodie.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/larp_moo_2_aobs3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" src="http://www.alwaysfoodie.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/larp_moo_2_aobs3.jpg" height="266" width="400" /></span></a><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></span></div>
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<b>ลาบหมู, ลาบไก่</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Laab moo/gai</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Ground pork/chicken salad</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is an Isaan dish with a strong lime flavor. Eat with sticky rice!</span></div>
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<a href="http://rachelcooksthai.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/khao-man-gai-6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="color: black;"><img border="0" src="http://rachelcooksthai.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/khao-man-gai-6.jpg" height="265" width="400" /></span></a><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></span></div>
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<b>ข้าวมันไก่</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Khao man gai</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Boiled chicken and rice</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">A pretty popular street food. It comes with a yummy spicy sauce on the side, as well as a bowl of soup.</span></div>
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<b>พัดกระเพราหมู, ผัดกระเพราไก่</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Phat gaprow moo/gai</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Basil pork/chicken</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I've heard it said that this is the dish Thais order when they don't really know what they want. And this "default dish" is certainly worthy of that standing. Spicy, and really good with fish sauce and a fried egg on top!</span></div>
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<b style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">ไข่เจียว</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Khai jiao</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Omelette</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">The "safe for the whole family" dish. This normally comes either plain or with ground pork. Dip in the creamy spicy sauce if you want, and eat with rice.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Rice:</span></b><br />
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<span style="clear: left; color: black; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://static.flickr.com/84/215979659_ae53fba75a_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://static.flickr.com/84/215979659_ae53fba75a_o.jpg" height="267" width="400" /></a></span><br />
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<b>ข้าวผัด</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Khao phat</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Fried rice</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="clear: left; color: black; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://migrationology.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/khao-pad-tom-yum.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; font-family: -webkit-standard; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://migrationology.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/khao-pad-tom-yum.jpg" height="300" width="400" /></a></span></span></div>
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<b>ข้าวผัดต้มยำ</b></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Khao phat tom yum</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Fried rice with tom yum</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">All the greatness of Thai-style fried rice and tom yum soup combined into one. </span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-35498634150774977002015-06-01T09:11:00.000-07:002015-06-01T09:11:47.834-07:00Language Shock<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I have been in Thai language school for 3 months now. Which pretty much means I can tell you my name, "happy birthday," that my air conditioner is broken, it's really hot outside, and I want to order fried rice.<br />
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Other than a couple semesters of Spanish in high school and college, I've never <i>really</i> studied another language before. Like the <i>I-actually-want-to-speak-this-in-life</i> kind, not the <i>I-just-want-to-pass-this-test</i> kind.<br />
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It's just a miracle that anyone can ever communicate at all. For real. And I don't even mean Thai, I mean <i>any</i> language.<br />
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The more remarkable aspect of this is when someone learns to speak English, with all its crazy idioms and metaphors and junk.<br />
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For example.<br />
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I was riding in the car, listening to music the other day with my Thai friend. She speaks a good amount of English, but not enough to navigate the parts of it that make no sense. "<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfWlot6h_JM">Shake It Off</a>" by Taylor Swift came on, and as we listened to the lyrics play play play play play play I asked her if she understood what the phrase "shake it off" meant. She nodded in affirmation, then stuck out her hand and... shook it off. <br />
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I mean, that's fair. <br />
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After I laughed at her for not being fluent in my first language, I told her in some-Thai-most-English language, "It's like... something bad happens to you, and you say, 'Never mind! I don't care! It's fine.'"<br />
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The same thing happened when we listened to Ellie Goulding's "Love Me Like You Do," who tells her lover, "Only you can set my heart on fire." When I asked my friend if she understood that phrase, she nodded again and pretended to remove her heart from her chest, then talked about... setting it on fire.<br />
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English is so hard.<br />
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Sometimes, when I'm in a team meeting or serious conversation with someone, I check out for just a second to think, <i>We understand all the words each other is saying and <b>that's amazing</b>.</i><br />
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When it comes to people understanding me in Thai -- now that's a miracle. I call the same girl every week when I want to order more drinking water. I have no idea who she is, but her name and number were given to me by a friend of a friend who said, "Just tell her you want to order water to the <i>farang</i> ("white foreigner") house." So that's what I do, week after week. I call, and something happens in between that causes these guys to roll up and bring me humongous bottles of water, and then I don't die of dehydration.<br />
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I felt a little guilty today for calling this girl all the time and never trying to actually make conversation, so I threw in a "Are you doing well?" and tried to slip in a "Thank you for helping me," as she interrupted me with polite Thai words in a way that seemed like she was ready to get off the phone with this needy white girl who speaks Thai like a 2-year-old.<br />
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And it wasn't annoying or hurtful or anything, because I get it. Communicating in a foreign way is just kind of exhausting. Learning to change your greeting phrases from things we would say to Westerners like, "Hi, how are you? My name is Reagan. What's yours?" to, "Where did you come from? Where are you going? Have you eaten yet?" is one of a thousand adjustments that must be made to live life here without looking like a freak all the time. I'm thankful that Thai people are pretty gracious and<i> </i>that I like them enough to <i>want</i> to adapt. <br />
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And on the days that I don't, a good sandwich and an episode of "<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0386676/">The Office</a>" normally do the trick.</div>
Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-65836972869489125322014-12-03T17:24:00.000-08:002014-12-03T17:24:54.207-08:00Everything You Want to Know!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 38px;">Thanksgiving.</span></span><span style="font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.6em;"> </span></h1>
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Plates piled high with stuffing and sweet potatoes. Familiar and perhaps new faces gathered ‘round a seasonally decorated table. Seconds. Tales of childhood shenanigans, whispers of thanks for loved ones seated next to you. Thirds. Pie. Naps. <em><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1981677/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Pitch Perfect</a>. </em>Yes to all of it.</div>
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As we tip our hats to another Thanksgiving gone by and look forward with wonder-wide eyes to the next month of frenzied shopping and travel plans;<br />
as we light our <a href="http://www.cresourcei.org/cyadvent.html" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Advent</a> candles and prepare—hopeful, expectant—to celebrate the birth of the Messiah, Emmanuel, Prince of Peace, God With Us…<br />
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Let’s <strong>calm down</strong>. Let’s sit back. Let’s make <em>giving thanks</em> an everyday thing.<br />
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I, for one, have something in particular to be thankful about.</div>
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A few weeks ago, I announced that I needed $300 more per month before I could buy a plane ticket for Thailand.<br />
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Guess what? People pledged their dollars, and now<br />
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<span style="font-size: 28px;"><strong>I’M FULLY FUNDED!</strong></span></div>
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You guys responded, God provided, and I bought a ticket to take me across the ocean to the other side of the world.<br />
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So <strong><em>thank you</em></strong>, a zillion times over. <strong>And welcome to Team Thailand.</strong></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Several people have asked me several of the same questions over the past several months, so for the sake of clarification and something else to hang on your fridge (next to my </span><a href="http://instagram.com/p/vqwUmsSVKW/?modal=true" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">prayer card</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">, of course—P.S., let me know if you want one of those), here’s a cheat sheet to everything you ever wanted to know about what I’m doing with my life next year on out. </span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Where are you going?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Thailand</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Where in Thailand?</strong><br />
<a href="https://www.google.com/maps/place/Lopburi,+Thailand/@15.2016136,100.9214719,9z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m2!3m1!1s0x30e1fffd5ad98ed5:0xe352f6870bef23da" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Lopburi</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;"> for the first year, then up to the Isaan region for the rest of the years. Potentially in our around </span><a href="https://www.google.com/maps/place/Khon+Kaen,+Mueang+Khon+Kaen+District,+Khon+Kaen,+Thailand/@16.4438788,102.8200932,12z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m2!3m1!1s0x3122602b91988e2f:0x93f0805cf799cc6" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Khon Kaen</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">.</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Do they speak Taiwanese there?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Nope, that’s Taiwan. People from Thailand speak Thai.</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Do you already know the language?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Not yet. We will spend our first year in language school in Lopburi. One-on-one tutoring and homework galore.</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Are you Asian?</strong></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Sorry, these almond eyes are Native American + white.</span></div>
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">What made you pick Thailand?</strong></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">I always respond, “Jesus,” but people always seem dissatisfied with that response. So the short story is that I felt a burden for church planting in Asia when I went on the </span><a href="http://www.worldrace.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">World Race</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">. After I came home from the Race, I worked at </span><a href="http://www.echoranch.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Echo Ranch Bible Camp</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;"> for the summer. </span><a href="https://avantministries.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Avant</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">’s Director of Recruitment came to speak at camp for a week and suggested I check out their church planting team for Thailand. Check. (Go </span><a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2014/10/how-it-actually-went-down.html" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">here</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;"> if you want the long story.)</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">When do you leave?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">I fly out of OKC on December 29</span><sup style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; line-height: 22.5px;">th</sup><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">. I’ll spend the next 8 days in Chicago with friends, then fly from there to Thailand on January 6</span><sup style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; line-height: 22.5px;">th</sup><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">. </span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Are you excited?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Yes. Excited for new things and being with my team and living overseas and fulfilling the calling God gave me. But sad about leaving my family, friends, church, and American lifestyle. Nervous. Hopeful. All the feelings.</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">How long will you be gone?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Probably 5-7 years. </span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Will you get to come back before then?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Yes, probably after about 2 years.</span><br />
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Are you going with anyone?</strong><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px;">Yes. A girl named Liz, a married couple (Matt & Heather), another married couple (Tim & Marnee), their 2 kids (Alex & Dominic).</span><br />
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<strong>Whoa! A family?? Are they bringing their kids?</strong><br />
Yeah, Tim & Marnee ended up liking their boys a lot, so they decided to bring them along.<br />
<br />
There's another girl named Jolene who will be joining us for the first year. She'll be helping out as Alex and Dominic's homeschool teacher during that time.</div>
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<strong>Did you already know them/are they people you went with on the World Race?</strong><br />
No, <a href="https://avantministries.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Avant</a> put us all on the team after we had each gone through their <a href="https://avantministries.org/go/am-i-ready/cop/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">orientation program</a> and they appointed us as missionaries and assessed our gifts and skills and prayed about it and stuff. We met as a complete team for the first time at our <a href="http://eepurl.com/2qtrf" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">team training</a> in July 2014.<br />
<br />
No, I went on the <a href="http://www.worldrace.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">World Race</a> through <a href="https://www.adventures.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Adventures in Missions</a>, a different missions organization.<br />
<br />
<strong>Can people come visit you?</strong><br />
Yes.<br />
<br />
<strong>Wait, where are you going again? Taiwan?</strong><br />
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<strong>What does your family think about it?</strong><br />
Very supportive and encouraging. But you know. Sad for themselves, happy for me.<br />
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<strong>Will you get jobs there/Do you have to raise money/How is support raising going?</strong><br />
Probably not. We want to have as much time as possible to devote to ministry.<br />
<br />
I have been raising support since March, and it’s going great! All raised!<br />
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<strong>What will you do there?</strong><br />
Learn how to speak and write Thai. Pray. Meet people. Make friends. Tell them about Jesus. Pray. Encourage them to tell their family and friends. Encourage them to meet together to talk more about Jesus. Encourage them to tell more people about Jesus. Sweat. Eat rice. Pray.<br />
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<strong>Will you have Internet access?</strong><br />
Yes.<br />
<br />
<strong>Do you think you'll meet your husband there?</strong><br />
Absolutely. That’s actually the real reason I’m going.*<br />
<br />
<strong>What would you do if you met someone before you left?</strong><br />
Ask him if he likes Skype and Thai tea.<br />
<br />
<strong>What is the weather like?</strong><br />
Hot (80s-90s) and humid. Oklahoma summertime 24/7.<br />
<br />
<strong>What will you wear?</strong><br />
Only the best and truest missionary attire:</div>
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But for real, the women will wear blouses and long skirts. Knees covered at all times, or else.<br />
<br />
<strong>In some countries, they don’t allow you to come in as a missionary, and/or it’s dangerous to be a Christian. Is that how it is in Thailand?</strong><br />
No. Thankfully, Thailand is a country that does not have those kinds of restrictions on religion, like many others in the <a href="http://joshuaproject.net/resources/articles/10_40_window" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">10/40 Window</a>.<br />
<br />
<strong>What are you most nervous about?</strong><br />
(1) Getting lost. I have a hard enough time navigating my hometown using <a href="https://www.google.com/maps" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Google Maps</a>. (2) Potentially being single forever.** Let’s be honest. (3) Embracing Thailand as my new <em>normal</em>. Not as a <em>trip</em> or <em>time out from real life</em>, but as my new <em>home</em>. As excited as I am to learn a new culture and language and experience God on the other side of the world, I know that culture shock will be hard and missing the comfort and familiarity of my passport country will be real. In spite of those things, I want to be all in. <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Thessalonians+5%3A24&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">He who calls me is faithful</a>, and <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Philippians+4%3A19&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">He will supply every need of mine according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus</a>. It’s going to be tough, but it’s going to be good.<br />
<br />
Alright, y’all. I know that was a little lengthy, so thanks for bearing with me. If there’s anything I missed, let me know.<br />
<br />
<em>What have you been up to? How can I be praying for you?</em><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: 12px;"><em><strong>* Just kidding.</strong><br /><strong>** Avant Ministries does not restrict their single missionaries from getting married. All hope is not lost.</strong></em></span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-29403873470672445722014-11-11T18:49:00.000-08:002014-11-11T18:52:22.623-08:00Fall<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">There’s a fire roaring in the fireplace.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first one of the season.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It feels nice to have this Oklahoma
summer finally come to a close, opening wide arms to reds and golds and wool
scarves and tall boots and soul foods.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The Thunder is playing in Milwaukee and on my TV screen, dogs curled up
on the carpet, family members lounging on the sofa and enjoying the warmth of
the flames and our own togetherness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Welcome, autumn.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I’m basking in the moment, one of few I will have over the
next five to seven years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a
moment I would have judged others for in years past.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pre-grace Reagan deemed comfort and happiness unacceptable
companions to a true Christiatin life, which certainly only included pain and
cross-cultural evangelism and living in abject poverty alongside the poorest of
the poor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not that I was living
this way, mind you, but the thought somehow seemed enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">But these days, I receive it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In all its simplicity, its lack of striving or spiritual
depth or saving souls from the pit of Hell as we speak, I receive it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Because I believe Jesus is present in
those moments of rest, extensions of deep breath and nestling in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm+23&version=ESV">He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.</a></i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">There is a time for the pouring out, the all in, the giving
of yourself to the work of the Lord.</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">And there is a time for the settling in the quiet and the peace, the
thanksgiving, the joy in simplicity.</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Now is the time.</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Tomorrow
is another day.</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Lord, may I see it
with Your eyes and give it our all.</span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-8037416620107139852014-10-31T19:48:00.000-07:002014-11-11T19:49:18.573-08:00Challenge to Change<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 38px;">How can I best capture October 2014 in one word?</span></span></h1>
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<em><span style="font-family: inherit;">S t r e t c h</span></em></h3>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />It's another one of the Christians' favorite words, no doubt. (Don't forget <a href="http://www.dictionaryofchristianese.com/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">this handy resource</a> for many of the rest.)<br /><br />My sister got married last weekend. It was a good and exciting thing, of course, but I think I 'zilla-ed out more than she did during the few days leading up to it. When things weren't getting done the way she wanted or 1am ticked by and the "To Do" list seemed only to grow or anyone so much as thought about saying words to me within an hour of my waking the following morning, the <em>snappy</em> and <em>selfish</em> and <em>First World entitlement complexed</em> Reagan monster flared up, and I found myself continuing to repent and ask questions like, <strong>"Who am I? I thought I was over this."</strong></span></div>
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<em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Behold my alter ego. </span></em></div>
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<span style="color: #606060; font-family: inherit;"><i><span style="font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">………………………………………………………………………………………..</span></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;">This is a post from the "Missionary-ish Tales" E-News. Read the rest <a href="http://us6.campaign-archive2.com/?u=ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db&id=10ba908b43">here</a></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;">, or subscribe to the monthly e-mails </span><a href="http://eepurl.com/Pwx09" style="background-color: white; color: #7d181e; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">here</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;">.</span></span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-36677785077143964682014-10-28T23:25:00.000-07:002014-10-28T23:27:30.237-07:00In the Quiet<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">When was the last time you
let God meet you in the silence?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Maybe you were out of
words.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe you were out of ways
to fix, to solve, to do it on your own.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Or maybe you were just weary in your body, your heart, your mind.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You didn’t have any fancy prayers to
conjure up for Him, so you sat still, waiting with only minimal expectation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Maybe you lay on the floor,
face down, candle burning in the background to offer some sense of presence and
scent of comfort.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe you even
whispered, “I’ve got nothing, God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I need to hear from You.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">And maybe He spoke.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">In that moment of surrender,
maybe He affirmed things He has already said before, like <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+peter+5%3A6-7&version=NIV">Humble yourself, therefore, under My mighty hand, that I may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Me because I care for you.</a><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+16%3A11&version=ESV">In My presence, there is fullness of joy.</a><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts+3%3A19-20&version=ESV">Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins maybe blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from My presence…</a><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">And maybe refreshment did
indeed come.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">God has drawn me lower than
my knees more often that not this month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And while the literal posture of submission isn’t always comfortable, it
inevitably reminds my spirit who’s in charge.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">And, you know what?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s a <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">really good thing</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Because, seriously, how
often do we find ourselves praying for things we only <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">sort of</i> believe God cares about or will follow through on?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or feeling like His attention is better
directed elsewhere, that we shouldn’t take up too much of His time?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Or praising Him for being such a great
Creator and for saving us from eternal punishment, but not believing in His
intimate love for His creation and his ability <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">and desire</i> to save us from anything else?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Most of us have frequently
heard of the <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">ACTS </b>(<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">A</b>doration, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">C</b>onfession,<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> T</b>hanksgiving,<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"> S</b>upplication) method of prayer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And although some may get hung up on whole
“formula” sort of approach, I think there’s something to it, and especially to
beginning our conversation with the Almighty with adoration and praise.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p><br /></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">Because,
really, our view of who God is and how He relates with us directly correlates
with how we view every other aspect of life.</span></b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Adoration and worship
must be a part of our prayers to keep us in perspective.</b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p><br /></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Praising God for being
sovereign leads us to believe that He sees and orchestrates the bigger
picture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Praising Him for being
faithful reminds us He will keep His promises to us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Praising Him for creating the world affirms that He will
sustain our needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Knowing
and recounting the works and character of God fan the flame of confidence that
He will continue to be exactly whom He has always been.</span></div>
</div>
Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-67491238920948334832014-10-13T00:04:00.000-07:002014-10-13T18:54:25.600-07:00How it actually went down<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">…Or maybe if I check Instagram one more time, I'll feel better
about myself, since my internet presence and likeability reflect my real life power
to please the masses.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><br></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">It's a lie I've believed more times than I can count. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"><br></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">There's always something, you know?
Some way we compare ourselves to the ideal, to each other, to our selves who
are becoming. For many, it's the dollar value of their occupations, the final
settling down of the restless dreamer, the arriving at a longed-for
destination, the ring on the finger. The inner voice of failure arises when we
see our youth kids get engaged before we do or find ourselves at a job far from
worthy of our ACT scores. And when we see "everyone else" get there,
that magical land where the grass is greener, we sink and sulk and strive to be
as good, holy, and <i>finally</i> <i>trusting enough</i> as they must have been to have the
desires of their hearts – our hearts – fulfilled.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">Because, of course, that is the
Christian formula for happiness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">A couple months after I announced that I would be heading
out to the world, I got a message from a friend who has followed my blog for
awhile. He asked me how I got there, how my longing and doing finally
converged, how it all came together and my calling became a crystal clear path
before me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">The assumption was well-intentioned but a little… well, <i>skewed</i>.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">I sort of laughed as I replied.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made me feel like one of those happily married people I
had so often envied, heart panging every time I scrolled past one of their <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">#besthusbandever </b> posts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People see me and think I have <i>arrived</i>? Seriously?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">Because here’s how it actually went down.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">I went on the <a href="http://www.worldrace.org/" target="_blank">World Race</a> and came home a <a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2012/11/wrecked.html" target="_blank">wreck</a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not because I hated America or because
I had a distinct calling to start an orphanage in Africa and didn’t have the
funds or balls to get over there yet, but because I knew the world was broken and lost and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I had no freaking idea what to do next</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean, <a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2013/02/the-next-step.html" target="_blank">I knew I’d be going to Alaska again</a>, so that became
sort of my lifeline for a few more months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On the Race, the biggest “future life work” hint I took away
was that <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">my heart came most alive when I
was in evangelism/church-planting/Gospel-discussing kinds of ministries… but no
more of this short-term missions business.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></b>The place I observed the most spiritual darkness and
need to be reached was India, and that was the country I liked the least, so <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">obviously</i> that made the cut for my
limited search criteria once my feet hit American soil and I started scouting
out the next big thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> (</span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">You know us Christians, always feeling like we are called
to only the hardest tasks...</span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"> </span><i style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Scratch that, I can only speak for myself…
maybe.</span></i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">) </span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">And not that I thought
that I was some big BA missionary who had it all together, but I figured… </span><i style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">What else am I supposed to do with my
life? This is all I care about.</i></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">Anyway, I didn’t find anything that <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">stuck</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus, I was
dealing with whether I was feeling led/feeling like I wanted to commit to a
romantic relationship, and… well, you know how that goes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">So I went back to Alaska as a summer staff member at <a href="http://www.echoranch.org/" target="_blank">Echo Ranch Bible Camp</a>. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I toiled in
the Lord’s work on the last frontier, I asked God to open a door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You
know, God, for some long-term church planting-ish thing in India (or anywhere
else in Asia, if that’s cool with You).</i></span><br>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">The next week, Justin, Director of Recruitment for
<a href="http://avantministries.org/" target="_blank">Avant Ministries</a>, showed up to be the camp chapel speaker for a week, and we
became friends over controversial theological conversations and mostly-agreeable mission trip
stories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He told me I seemed like
I would be a good fit for Avant’s <a href="http://avantministries.org/about/short-cycle/" target="_blank">short-cycle church planting</a> Thailand team because I “have
missions experience” and “take God seriously” and “want to go to Asia”, so I
should check them out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
reply?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“You’re a recruiter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course you’re saying that.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">I spent half the summer researching missions opportunities
in India and the other half wondering about Thailand and <a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2014/03/thailand-q.html">the whole 5-7 year thingy</a> and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the entire summer</i> freaking
out about not having a plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
battled bouts of anxiety and loneliness and knowing I wasn’t being present
where I was but not feeling motivated to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">be</i>
anywhere <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">but</i> everywhere else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The more I researched, the more
overwhelmed I felt, and the more I just prayed for a blazing, this-can-only-be-from-God kind of sign.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> But p</span></span><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">seudo-signs came and went the whole three months long,
with little </span><i style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">confirmation</i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"> or </span><i style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">peace</i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"> or whatever seal of approval with
which we so often seek to stamp our big decisions.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">I got home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Still no burning bush or writing on the wall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I job hunted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
job landed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I online dated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I put missions on the back burner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took missions off the back burner and
decided, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">What the heck.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I might as well go to their <a href="http://avantministries.org/go/am-i-ready/cop/" target="_blank">orientation thing</a> and confirm that we are definitely not what each other is
looking for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>I was brutally
honest on all my personality/emotional & organizational assessments,
determined to display the same amount of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m
seriously not good enough for you guys</i> in my interviews with the staff once
I got there.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">And I did all those things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And guess what?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">“We really appreciate your honesty, Reagan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if you feel okay about going
through with it, we will go ahead and appoint you as an Avant missionary.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">I freaked out all two weeks long, simultaneously loving
all that I was seeing and inwardly dying over the (non-Holy Spirit inspired)
conviction that, if I really signed up for this thing, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I WAS GOING TO BE SINGLE FOREVER</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">But I decided to trust God who appeared to be showing me
an open door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wrote, “I think
I’m going to marry Avant,” in my journal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And I took the leap.<o:p></o:p></span><br>
<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;"><br></span>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">As I have progressed through giving others the news,
asking for their prayers (and their money), I have held this opportunity with
open hands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not the time
frame I was looking for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not
the location I was looking for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It’s certainly not the marital status I was looking for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On my own, <a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2014/05/i-blew-it.html" target="_blank">I am not cut out for this</a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have never lived in
another country for more than a month.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have never seriously tried to learn another language.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My spoken words are quick and choppy
and mumbled and jumbled and don’t always know how to present Jesus in all the
right ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can be painfully
sarcastic and heartbreakingly uncompassionate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And yet, it appears that God has called this mess of a human
to the nations, because <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">it’s not about
my missionary prowess, but about His miraculous power</b>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if that same power that raised
Christ from the dead really does live in me… <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">then maybe I have a chance after all.</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">And so maybe all that makes it a little easier, this
mindset of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You can take it if You want,
Jesus – it’s not mine to cling to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></i>And I wonder if that was always meant to be the point of a calling,
the pinnacle of “arriving” – that <b>it is He who calls and He who directs us because
it is He who created and He who knows us…</b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So when did it ever <i>just</i> become about our passions and the line of work that
makes us happy and what everyone else has made of themselves and what we <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">surely</i> “deserve”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">When did it ever become about measuring ourselves against
ourselves or others, completely disregarding <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">the reason God created us in <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">His</b>
image</i>?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br>
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<span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">What if we just asked God to show us where He is already
working, where He wants us to join Him… and quit worrying about </span><i style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">whether it’s good enough</i><span style="color: #1a1a1a; font-family: Arial;">?</span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-43914930545468660202014-10-04T19:06:00.000-07:002014-11-11T19:08:14.087-08:00Time in a Bottle<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 14px;"><em>Three.</em></span><br /><br />People keep asking me if I’m excited about moving to Thailand, and of course I am… but <span style="font-size: 18px;"><strong>THREE</strong></span>.<br /><br />It’s almost like an itsy, bitsy, mini-experience of what being on your deathbed must feel like. <em>What do I wish I would have done? What do I regret? What do I need to make right before I leave?</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is a post from the "Missionary-ish Tales" E-News. Read the rest <a href="http://us6.campaign-archive2.com/?u=ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db&id=c9d056c614">here</a>, or subscribe to the monthly e-mails <a href="http://eepurl.com/Pwx09">here</a>.</span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-78446011531322391092014-10-03T11:53:00.000-07:002014-10-03T11:59:21.029-07:00When God's Will Gives You Lemons<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 38px;">Honk if you love planning.</span></span></h1>
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<span style="font-size: 15px;">Or if you love when plans exist. Ones that are relatively foolproof and give you peace of mind from any stray detours that may pop out of nowhere because not only is Plan A a thing, but also Plans B-AA. The world and all its unpredictables submit to you.<br /><br />I think Christians, for the most part, feel entitled to have their plans work out. You know, because we’re “in the will of God” or whatever. Like we forgot all the times in the Bible when Paul was in God’s will when He shared Jesus with people who didn’t know Him, and then <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Corinthians+11%3A16-33&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">he got stoned/beaten/imprisoned/killed</a>. Or when the Old Testament prophet <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Jeremiah+7%3A27-28&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Jeremiah</a> spent 40 years warning his people what would happen if they did not give up their sin and turn back to God – and was completely ignored. Or <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Judges+20&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">when the Israelites asked God if they should go to war</a>, and <strong>He tells them <em>yes</em></strong>. They follow through… and are <em>annihilated</em>. They ask God again, with tears and offerings, and <strong>He confirms</strong> that they should fight a second time. Again, they are horribly defeated. They ask Him again, earnestly seeking Him once more, and <strong>He tells them to go</strong> and fight a third time. <em>This</em> time, they nearly wipe out their adversaries.<br /><br />We talk a lot about the idea of failure and "was this really God's will, since it's not working out?" kind of stuff. We sit on the floor with faces in our palms, tears in our eyes, fire on our lips, asking, “What the heck, God? I thought this is what you wanted me to do.”<br /><br />And sure, sometimes we take a chance, and things fall through. Sometimes we hear God wrong </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">(or "hear" what we want to hear)</span><span style="font-size: 15px;">. But sometimes, and perhaps a lot more often than we suspect… The </span><em style="font-size: 15px;">will of God </em><span style="font-size: 15px;">looks to us like a catastrophic failure.</span><br />
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I don’t know if you guys know this, but missionaries have actually been in Thailand for a really, really long time. Yet, somehow, the percentage of Christians remains below 1%. Of course, we want to analyze all the approaches to evangelism and church planting and <em>what those guys did wrong</em> and how we can be the miracle cure to the vast shortage of Christ followers. And there’s validity to a lot of that, probably. <em>(Well, besides us being the miracle cure. We’re not that cool.)</em><br />
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But… maybe those missionaries weren’t <em>all </em>necessarily doing it “wrong”. Maybe, for whatever purpose that only He can see for now, for whatever greater thing there is to come… God <em>designed it that way</em>. <br />
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I mean, that sounds really harsh. Like God doesn’t give a crap at all about us or what we think. <strong><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+103&version=ESV" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">And that is a lie</a>. </strong>Somehow, this mysterious God of ours simultaneously loves each of us fiercely and cares about every single detail of our lives – and His "<a href="http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/biblical-texts-to-show-gods-zeal-for-his-own-glory" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;">ultimate goal is to uphold and display the glory of his name</a>." Small picture and big picture.<br />
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The truth is, sometimes, <strong>our perspective is just small. </strong><br />
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I wonder what it would be like to stand back and ask for His perspective. If we surrendered our false genie gods and prosperity gospels and said, “Lord I don’t get it, but I have to believe You do.” What if “living a better story” quit being about how dazzling our repurposed efforts looked and, instead, had only to do with seeing where God was working and <em>joining Him in it</em>, for <em>His</em> glory, no matter the cost?<br />
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That’s what my teammates and I are trying to wrap our heads around: the idea that, in spite of <a href="http://eepurl.com/2qtrf" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">our beautiful and God-inspired vision for Thailand</a>, <strong>we don’t know what will happen</strong>. Because people ask us about the strategy, the grand plan, the <em>So what are you guys going to actually <strong>do</strong>? </em>all the time. And honestly? Our plan is to ask God. To see where He is already working. And then to join Him in it. No matter what that ends up looking like.<br />
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Have you ever been there? That place where you thought you heard right, you truly believed God led you somewhere, and it didn’t work out… only to see Him bring it all together later? Or maybe He hasn’t – not yet – and you’re wondering what’s going on. <em>Tell us about it.</em></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-3426031456600205512014-09-04T15:23:00.000-07:002014-09-18T15:25:56.936-07:00Tree Training<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Team Thailand just wrapped up a whole 2 weeks of training at Avant HQ in Kansas City, MO, and now we know everything there ever was to know about how to plant churches where they don’t exist in the country of Thailand. Seriously. When it comes to the know-how of being a good teammate to knowing the number of flush toilets vs. molded bucket latrines are present in the country to developing intercultural effectiveness to taking </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">JUST THE RIGHT</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> visa photo to communicating like a pro to expecting reality to pegging you on the Thinker-Feeler-Doer Triad to mastering </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">exactly</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">how our taxes are going to work to knowing whatever the heck </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">tactical advantage</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">means… *BIG GASP*… we’ve nailed it for sure.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Alright, for real, now. We did learn a lot of useful stuff. We went through the book of Acts and studied the “missionary methods” of Paul and his buddies. We discussed how </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">suffering for Jesus is actually a real thing</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> and how, really, planting churches has nothing to do with how awesome we are, but with the power of the Holy Spirit.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">One of our assignments as a team was to cast a vision for what we want Thailand to look like as a result of us being there. Being good Christians and average creative geniuses, we took the entire two weeks to define our roles and create a visual image of the </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">thriving church of Thailand</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">We pictured a tree. Because a tree speaks of life and growth and something that starts small but becomes big and keeps getting bigger.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">A tree, as we know, begins with a </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">seed</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. This tree will begin with the seed of the story and life and </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Good News</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> of Jesus, the Light in the darkness. We will be carrying that seed with us – we, Team Thailand, the </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">shell</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;">Seeds don’t grow in dirt that is hard and dry, but in soft, broken up soil. In the same way, the Gospel will not thrive among people with hard hearts, but with </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;">broken</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;"> ones, recognizing their desperation for something beyond themselves.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Watered by the refreshing, life-giving </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">rain</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> of the Holy Spirit, the seed springs up, growing into the </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">trunk</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> of a mighty tree that is the Church.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">As the tree continues to grow, it bears branches, then, leaves, the fruit of a maturing church, a </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">national Thai church</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> that reaches beyond itself to the broken world outside: to </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">break the chains of false religion</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, to </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">fulfill the physical needs of its own people</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, to</span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">meet together to talk about Jesus</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> when we’re not there, to </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">fight for social justice</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">That’s our vision for Thailand. And not that we want to tell God what to do, as if He looks at our plans and goes, </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Yeah, that idea is actually a lot better than Mine, let’s go with that instead. </em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">But </span><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+timothy+2%3A4&version=ESV" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank"><strong>if it’s really God’s desire for all people to be saved</strong></a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, we hope and pray it’s a lot like the plan He already has for His people there. </span></div>
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<strong>NEWS:</strong></div>
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<li>The team has set an official date to arrive in Thailand: <span style="font-size: 18px;"><strong>January 8, 2015</strong></span>. Yay!</li>
<li>It looks like the way I've been reporting my financial support has been an little janky. Right now, I have raised <strong>74%</strong> of my necessary <strong>monthly support </strong>(not including <strong>one-time gifts</strong>, which will go directly to one-time costs like language school, my plane ticket to Thailand, etc.). I'm so excited to be nearing the 100% mark (which I have to reach before I can board the plane)! If you would like to be a part of our ministry through monthly or one-time financial gifts, please click the <strong>Help Send Me to Thailand!</strong> button below. </li>
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<strong>PRAYER:</strong></div>
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<li>Please pray for me and my team as we prepare to go: that we will complete the "tasky" things that need to get done, but especially that we will be able to invest well in our relationships with people.</li>
<li>Please continue to pray for the people of Thailand: that God will empower Thai Christians and missionaries already there to share the Gospel boldly with others, and that He will draw even more Thai unbelievers to His Son.</li>
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<span style="font-size: 18px;"><strong><span style="color: black; font-family: sans-serif; line-height: 19px;">Kòp kun mâak!</span></strong></span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-29148169004446677712014-08-11T17:10:00.000-07:002014-09-18T15:27:09.733-07:00Photobomb!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 38px;">Better late than never, right?</span></span></h1>
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Apologies for the delay on this month's e-news, but I figured I'd try to crank something out before the next one is due in 3 weeks.<br />
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I can't believe we're wrapping up another whole summer. School supplies are flying off the shelves, people are finally coming home from DisneyWorld, and all I can think about is how the current temperature is what I'm going to h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ get to experience everyday for the next 5-7 years of my life. Good times.</div>
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<span style="font-size: 11px;"><em><span style="line-height: 1.6em; text-align: left;">Khon Kaen, Thailand is where our team will most likely be living after our year of language school.</span></em></span></div>
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As I'm sure many of you have experienced, this last month of my life has been pretty packed. So instead of giving my usual quirky sermonette, I decided to update/bomb you with photos of my July existence.</div>
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Here's where I've been the last month (and where I'll keep being until the end of this one):</div>
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<span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>Don't take it too literally.</em></span></div>
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I resided in the home of Mark and Denise Bruner, who have been missionaries in Africa for most of their lives. Mark works for Avant, and the two of them regularly host people like me in their home to disciple them and help them explore their ministry giftings (i.e., they feed us and let us hang out with them and talk about Jesus and our lives, rub off all of their wisdom on us, and sign us up to volunteer in various ministries and outreach centers in Kansas City, MO so we can actually practice doing some of the things we’re going overseas to do). So, obviously, that’s exactly what happened.</div>
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I helped out at <a href="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/a6f89798-6b05-48a3-9941-877b64861a84.png" imageanchor="1" style="background-color: transparent; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/a6f89798-6b05-48a3-9941-877b64861a84.png" /></a>, which is an <a href="http://hopecenterkc.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">organization</a> that seeks to transform impoverished, violent, and hope-started communities into healthy, thriving, and Gospel-living communities. I interacted with groups of youth in different neighborhoods and helped the staff with random administrative/organizational tasks. </div>
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<span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>Sweet baby kids who came to the carnival neighborhood outreach.</em></span></div>
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At the <a href="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/b5ef17aa-2654-4111-bd98-39f4cb98cf1d.png" imageanchor="1" style="background-color: transparent; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/b5ef17aa-2654-4111-bd98-39f4cb98cf1d.png" /></a> office, I worked with the same recruiter who spoke at <a href="http://www.echoranch.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Echo Ranch Bible Camp</a> last summer and convinced me to give this organization a shot. In addition to a couple other writing projects, my main gig was to feedback and fancify his PowerPoints for this summer's chapel messages at ERBC.</div>
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<span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>he year wasn't important.</em></span></div>
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At <a href="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/62e0351c-4b6f-4f57-a5b4-1d888c4fe261.png" imageanchor="1" style="background-color: transparent; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/62e0351c-4b6f-4f57-a5b4-1d888c4fe261.png" /></a>, a <a href="http://www.eleoscoffee.com/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">coffee shop</a> that provides food, clothing, other essentials, and the Gospel to the down-and-out in Northeast KC, I had coffee with a gangster, put together puzzles and talked about God with a 4-year-old, invented sandwiches, and helped transport a semi-homeless lady to a psychiatric hospital.</div>
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<span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>Coffee for Jesus!</em></span></div>
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While July was a whirlwind of different ministry roles and interruptions to normal life, August here in Kansas City is a little different. I'm spending this month with my <a href="http://eepurl.com/PwwAv" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">team</a> at the <a href="http://avantministries.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Avant</a> headquarters, where we'll be going through team training (i.e., learning how to plant churches without killing each other). More on that in the next e-news.<br />
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<em><strong>THE STUFF OF PRAYER:</strong></em></div>
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<li style="text-align: left;"><em>God has been giving me a heart overhaul over the last month. It's one of those pain-leads-to-growth kinds of things, so I am honestly excited and grateful for it. He appears to be doing the same thing in a few of my teammates as well. Please pray for us, that we will hear His voice and be obedient to what He desires for us.</em><br /> </li>
<li><em>I have reached 82% of my required monthly support! Thank you to those of you who have chosen to partner with me in this Kingdom work. Please pray for my team as we continue to seek ministry partners to serve with us through prayer and finances. If you believe the Lord is leading you to help send me to Thailand, please click the button below.</em></li>
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<strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;"><br /></strong><span style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;">What have you been up to this month? What has God been teaching you?</span><strong style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; text-align: left;"><br />I would love to be praying specifically for each of you. <a href="mailto:reagan.taylor@avmi.org?subject=Prayer%20Request" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Please tell me how!</a></strong></td></tr>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-63256177721726725602014-07-14T22:34:00.002-07:002014-07-14T23:29:33.423-07:00Purity Culture<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If there’s one thing I’m terrible at – well, besides
snowboarding, and whistling, and technology, and picking out non-burn-inducing
mouthwash – </span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">it’s romantic
relationships.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You guys, for real.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m the worst.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s all fun and games while the mystery is still
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know, trying to figure
out if they’re into you, the inconsistent and unpredictable texting, the
semi-ambiguous hangouts, the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">game</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But once there’s, like, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">intentionality</b> involved, as in words
like, “I am interested in you, and I want to get to know you better,” my mind
and body go into <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">freak out</i></b> mode.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Because, in my mind, as soon as someone gives up the ruse, throws in the
towel on the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">game</i>, that someone just
gave me something, a piece of their heart or mind or <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">something</i> of themselves for which I am now responsible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Responsible to accept and cherish or to
give back with a little more wear and tear than before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can’t handle it.</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was in a coffee shop with some good friends a few
weeks ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> O</span>ne was in a struggling relationship, another was struggling to decide whether she
wanted to pursue a relationship, and then there was me: single and free.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“I just don’t know what to do,” one of the struggling ones
said through tears.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I mean, I
feel like I’ve been told my whole life to be so careful in dating, to guard
myself against impurity and being with the wrong kind of guy, but it just
produced this fear of screwing up to the point where <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I didn’t live</i>.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We all chimed in with similar feelings, recalling the weight
of the church youth group <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i>purity culture</i></b> in which we
grew up, telling us not to give ourselves away or kiss boys in places we
wouldn’t want to tell our grandmas about or <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">maybe
just not date at all</i> because <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">really,
what’s the point, </i>and<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> who wants that
emotional baggage?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>Because if
you hand a guy your emotional or physical rose, or Styrofoam cup, or wrapped up
Jolly Rancher before you marry him, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">you’re
damaged goods</b>, and nobody wants you anymore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a culture of performance and fear, one that got us
hyped up about our husband lists and wedding days but never told us how to become
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">marriable</i> human beings because we
were so set on avoiding the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">potentially</i>
wrong relationship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Don’t get me wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I’m all for the heart behind the purity talks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m all for pursuing the best thing, sex in the context of
marriage, the way God designed it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But when we start exalting the pursuit of an ideal over the pursuit of
Jesus Himself, things always get a little screwy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And, honestly, I don’t know what to do about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m certainly not the first one to bring this up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It seems like I’ve recently seen more
blogs floating around than usual on this topic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m also not trying to chalk up my inability to function
well in relationships entirely to teaching I received throughout my youth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m a big girl, and I need to be able
to make big girl decisions.</span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But I do wonder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder what it would have been like to go about those
early dating years without so much fear of making the wrong decision, of
tainting my purity ring, of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">feeling</i>
condemned to Hades every time I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">went too
far</i>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder what it would
have been like to focus more on Jesus Himself, on the freedom and fullness of
His love that is more satisfying than professions of longtime interest over MSN
chat or a first “real kiss” under the stars, a love that actually fills you up
so much that you don’t even <i>want</i> to tread the wide road <b>because you’re already accepted</b> but reminds you that –
though <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">feeling</i> broken and worthless –
you are <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">still whole</b> and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">still redeemed</b> if you do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And maybe it’s okay for me to receive that piece of
emotional <i>something</i> and treat it the
best I can, knowing I may not be able to return it in its original state </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">–</span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> trusting that the God who makes me whole can take care of other people, too.</span></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-1250673749194799472014-07-01T14:57:00.000-07:002014-09-18T15:15:45.434-07:00Real Church<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 24px;">I love church.</span> </h3>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">But there was a time when I didn’t care about it all that much.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">As a kid who grew up going to Sunday School and Big Church and all those </span><a href="http://dictionaryofchristianese.com/" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Christianese</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> names we came up with for our specific Sunday morning gatherings, church was kind of just a thing good people </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">did</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. You go on Sundays and Wednesdays, and you felt guilty when you didn’t – not because it had that much of an impact on your personal life, but because… it’s just something you were </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">supposed to do</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, some vague standard you believed God held you to and was disappointed when you fell short. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">So I went. But I never really experienced or really even knew things like </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">community</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> or</span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">vulnerability </em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">were a thing, not until later. I threw myself into activities like choir and youth group and later youth group leading. I could put on the nametag that said, </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Hello, My Name Is “Productive Member of the Body of Christ”.</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> And as we Christians, or Americans, or simply just </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">people</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> often do, I let my worth get tied to my performance, my level of helpfulness, you know – </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">doing the Lord’s work</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, as if God couldn’t do it Himself.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">I guess that really started to change when I started attending </span><a href="http://www.celebraterecovery.com/" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Celebrate Recovery</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, a 12-step, Christ-centered recovery program for people of all backgrounds and hurts, habits, and hang-ups </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">(which is <strong>everyone</strong>, in case you missed that)</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. Up until that point, I had never been around people who </span><a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2011/03/hold-on-let-me-tuck-in-my-love-handles.html" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">let all their issues hang out</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. People who could stand in front of a group of mostly strangers and say, “I’m a believer in Jesus Christ who struggles with food addiction/codependency/alcohol addiction/people approval/control… and my name is _______.” I started to recognize the names of those struggles swirling around in me. And I experienced the freedom of actually saying, </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Yeah, me too</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">In those days, God started opening my eyes to what </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">real church</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> looked like. Not a</span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">building</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">, place where we can feel good about greeting newcomers and serving donuts and showing off our Sunday best. But a place where we can be </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">real</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> about our crap, because our “goodness” doesn’t make us good enough, because </span><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2018:20" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">we're gathering in a Name</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> other than our own. And, once the masks are finally off, we can empower each other to pursue </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Him</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> instead of the </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"><a href="http://www.missionary-ish.com/2012/11/tea-chah-i-am-not-finished.html" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">ideal images of ourselves</a>.</em></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">In those days, God gave me people who pointed out the lies I believed about myself and about Him. Lies like… </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">I missed the mark. I’m not good at anything. I am not valuable. God is disappointed in me. I can’t hear the voice of God. If I just had more faith, God would give me ________. I will never be at peace…</em></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">And He said, </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=matthew+5&version=NIV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Blessed are those</a> who [failed/mourn over life lost/are restless for something more], for they will be [comforted/filled/given the Kingdom of God].</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> He said,</span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Good! I’m glad you finally quit pretending you have it all together – because I actually do, and I am the One who makes you whole. I redeem your failures. I have made you worthy. I made you, I know you, I love you, and I’ve got you.</strong></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">It’s that sort of experience – that raw, authentic way of relating to others </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">and</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;"> to God – that makes you never want to go back to being </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">fine</em><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. It’s that same thing that I want for the people of Thailand, the freedom and life of </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">being known and loved anyway</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">. </span><em style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Yeah, you failed. So did I. But that failure to measure up was the train wreck that brought me back to the <a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Prodigal-God-Timothy-Keller/dp/1594484023" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Prodigal God</a>.</em></div>
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">Have you ever experienced <em>real church</em>? How did it change you?</strong></div>
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<strong style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px;">THE STUFF OF NEWS:</strong></div>
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<li>I will be spending most of July and August in a discipleship/internship at <a href="http://avantministries.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Avant</a>. I'll be volunteering in the Kansas City community, helping out at the Avant office, and building relationships with the people up there.<br /> </li>
<li>The roundtrip road trip through the Midwest was a success!</li>
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<tr><td class="mcnTextContent" style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; padding: 9px 18px;" valign="top"><strong>THE STUFF OF PRAYER:</strong><ul>
<li>Please continue praying for the people of Thailand - the ongoing political situation, the Christians and ministries already there, and that God will continue opening people's hearts to the Truth of the Gospel.<br /> </li>
<li>I have received financial pledges of about 77% of my required monthly support! Thank you to those of you who have chosen to partner with me in this Kingdom work. Please pray for my team as we continue to seek ministry partners to serve with us through prayer and finances. If you believe the Lord is leading you to help send me to Thailand, please click the button below.</li>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-32640399098036986672014-06-06T12:30:00.000-07:002014-06-22T14:57:51.131-07:00The Best Thing<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">First things first</span><span style="line-height: 38px;">…</span><span style="line-height: 1.6em;"> Yes. I am still going to Thailand.</span></span></h1>
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More than likely, you’ve heard a few things on the news about what’s going on with the political situation in the Land of Thais (or, if you’re like me, you learned about it from someone else who keeps up with the news). The most frequently asked questions I’ve gotten over the last month besides, ‘When are you leaving again?’ [January 2015] are, ‘Have you heard about what’s going on over there?’ and, ‘How does that affect you and your team?’<br />
<br />
Those are fair questions, and I’d like to answer them more thoroughly by directing you to the most recent newsletter of a couple on <a href="http://eepurl.com/PwwAv" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">my team</a>, Heather & Matt. They covered the ins and outs of it all pretty well, so I encourage you to <a href="http://us7.campaign-archive1.com/?u=cd312bb3017f36bf4ac11952f&id=98b1ff9f55&e=607f5897af" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">check out what they have to say</a>.<br />
<br />
Second things second… I’m going to be doing a fair amount of traveling and time away from home over the next several months. If you’re in any of these places, let’s hang out!</div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: 32px;">Coming to a City Near You!</span></strong></div>
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<strong> <span style="font-size: 18px;">JUN 21-25 Anderson, IN<br /> JUN 26-27 Chicago, IL<br /> JUN 28-29 Willmar, MN<br /> JUL 7-AUG 27 Kansas City, MO</span></strong></div>
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It’s hard to believe June is already upon us. It’s been nearly six months since I attended Candidate Orientation Program (COP) at Avant and was <a href="http://eepurl.com/Ns8Lj" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">officially appointed as one of their missionaries</a>, and it is now nearly the same amount of time until I hop on a plane and head to <em>the world</em>. I don’t know about you, but I’m one who doesn’t really know how to process a major life transition until it’s <em>just about </em>to happen or <em>is </em>happening or has <em>already </em>happened, so I’m trying not to make my head spin too much by forcing myself to think about what it will be like to… you know… <em>live really far away for a really long time</em>. I’m still pumped, don’t get me wrong. But it’s a bittersweet sort of thing, as these sorts of things usually are.<br />
<br />
Do you ever look back on your life, and then where you are now, and think, <em>Wow, I never would have thought I’d be here</em>? I do. Six or seven years ago, my dream was the typical, middle class American one: a well-enough paying job. A husband. A kid or two. Adult-like lifestyle changes, such as knowing how to cook and not cracking my knuckles anymore. But somewhere around 2009, <a href="http://eepurl.com/Ns8Lj" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">God started chipping away at that dream</a>. I never thought I’d be here. But I’m glad I am.<br />
<br />
Sometimes I look around at my friends and acquaintances who got the dream I cherished, the dream for which I longed and prayed for years, and my heart does that thing hearts too often do, getting wrapped up that icky mess called <em>envy, coveting, bitterness</em>.<br />
<br />
God’s been convicting me of that lately. <strong>Reagan, just because it’s your desire doesn’t mean it’s My best for you. </strong>He’s been saying that to me over and over. <strong>My best for someone else may be different than My best for you.</strong><br />
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/PeculiarTreasuresByJaquie" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>Peculiar Treasures by Jaquie</em></span></a></div>
If the God of the universe, the One who defeats evil and rescues the helpless and works in timing that is pretty much never at our convenience but always works out… well, better… if His <strong>best</strong> <em>for me, for now</em> is giving up the American dream, moving to the other side of the world, and telling other people about Him… <strong>then that’s what I want.</strong> Walking away, choosing something else, telling God, <em>Nah, I've got this…</em> It might work out okay. <strong>But it wouldn't be His best.</strong><br />
<br />
His <strong>best</strong> <em>for you, for now</em> may be working with those defiant foster kids in a group home, or mommying your two under five, or loving your wife as Christ loves the Church, or serving your ill-tempered parents, or trusting Him through the transition. Or maybe it's looking around you, realizing <em>this <strong>isn't</strong> His best</em>, and making some changes. It may not be easy, it may not be fun, but if it’s<strong> <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ephesians+2%3A10&version=NIV" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">the work He has prepared for you</a></strong>,<strong>then</strong> <strong>it’s His best for you</strong>. And it probably won’t last forever, because soon enough, <strong>He’ll show you the <em>next</em> best thing</strong>.<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: 14px;"><strong>Where does God have you right now? How can you learn to embrace it as <em>His best</em> for you? </strong><a href="mailto:reagan.taylor@avmi.org" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">I'd love to hear about it</a>.</span><br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: 14px;">……………………………………..</span></strong></div>
<br />
<strong>THE STUFF OF NEWS & PRAYER:</strong><br />
<ul>
<li>Please pray for the ongoing political situation in Thailand. Pray that God will work out His best for the people there.<br /> </li>
<li>Pray for me as I travel this summer.<br /> </li>
<li>I have received financial pledges of about 68% of my required monthly support! Thank you to those of you who have chosen to partner with me in this Kingdom work. Please pray for my team as we continue to seek ministry partners to serve with us through prayer and finances. If you believe the Lord is leading you to help send me to Thailand, please click the button below.</li>
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<tr><td align="center" class="mcnButtonContent" style="font-family: Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; padding: 16px;" valign="middle"><a class="mcnButton " href="http://avantministries.org/give/giving-options/" style="color: white; font-weight: bold; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank" title="Help Send Me to Thailand!">Help Send Me to Thailand!</a></td></tr>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-7108940030462435802014-05-01T18:00:00.000-07:002014-06-22T16:48:28.867-07:00I Blew It<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I had the perfect chance, but I checked out instead.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I got the usual small talk questions as I sat across the table from my coworker while we supervised the adolescents on our unit. "Are you married? Do you have kids (statements usually coupled with follow up phrases like, ‘Really? You’re too pretty to be single,’ or, ‘Oh, usually when you meet young, Caucasian females who seem to have it all together, they’re married.’ Thankfully, this guy just let it go).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“So, are you planning on doing this job for a while?” he asked.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Not forever,” I responded. “I'll be leaving to go do missions overseas in a little less than a year. I'm be going to Thailand with a team for 5 to 7 years, and we’ll be church planting.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Oh. I don't really know what that means.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Basically, we’ll be talking to people and telling them about Jesus and how great He is, and then they’ll tell their friends, and then… churches will form.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I said something else in Christianese that I can't recall now, something unintelligible to the untrained “churched” ear.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Oh, that's interesting,” he replied. “I'm not really religious, though. I used to go to church… But me and God, we have an understanding,” he said with a chuckle. When I asked what he meant, he went on. “When I was a kid, I was at church almost every night of the week. But I didn't like it. It just never really made sense to me. So now I don’t really go anymore.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Yeah… It would make sense that it would be hard to enjoy church when… you didn't really… care about it.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Conversation over.</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I left work that night feeling like such a missionary failure. What happened? This guy set me up for the perfect opportunity to share Jesus with him, but I was too scared to ask more questions, to breach uncomfortable boundaries. I had talked about Him with strangers before. It's not like this was my first ballgame. But for some reason, the right words just seemed to escape me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It was that same defeated feeling times a thousand that had me in tears as I revealed my fears to my teammates a week later in Kansas City. As we sat in our stuffed sofa and chairs, encircling a coffee table piled high with perhaps not-so-realistic expectations, I confessed. <i> I feel like I am going to fail in Thailand. I have no idea what to do, and I'm afraid I won't be able to create any relationships with the people.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<em id="__mceDel"><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If I can't do it here, what makes me think I'm going to be able to do it there?</span></b></em><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><img alt="" class="alignnone aligncenter" src="http://aaronmorris.info/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Emotional-Distress-Damages.jpg.jpg" height="480" width="360" /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm sure Moses and I would've had a few good laughs, a couple of blubbering idiots trying to tell God we can't do anything right.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And then I picture God sitting back with sort of an amused smile, thinking, "Okay… so what?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i>Apart from me you can do nothing</i></b>.”</span></em></em></em></em><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Turns out, nearly every teammate in that circle had experienced some kind of spiritual attack that weekend. Plaguing thoughts and fears about how there were a thousand people more qualified than them to go. About how the team would be better off if they weren’t there. About how they were just fooling everyone with a mere appearance of spirituality. About how, really, they were just hypocrites.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It should be no surprise. <b>The greater God’s plan, the greater Satan’s attack. </b>The more affirmed the calling, the more prevalent the lies seeking to destroy it.<em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"></em></em></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What I tend to forget is that the victory doesn’t depend on my sufficiency, but on the One who is already the Victor.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><br /></em></em></em></em><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><i>He </i></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em>is security.<em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><br /></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em></em><em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><i>He </i></em></em>is relationship.<em id="__mceDel"><em id="__mceDel"><br /></em></em><em id="__mceDel"><i>He </i></em>is sufficiency.<em id="__mceDel"></em></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img alt="" class="alignnone aligncenter" src="http://www.philmorgan.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/red-sea-parted.jpg" height="320" width="400" /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-14394444652362047932014-05-01T17:30:00.000-07:002014-06-22T16:41:21.722-07:00Easter & Other Stuff<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 24px;"><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">Christ is risen!</span></span></h1>
<div style="font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding: 0px;">
On Easter morning, I awoke with a profound sense of joy. I don’t ever remember feeling that deeply about Easter before. Rather than glazing over the anniversary of<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=john+20&version=NIV" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Jesus’ resurrection</a> – as if it were merely something that happened a long time ago that was somehow significant to our faith, but sort of irrelevant to us today – I placed myself in the story. What would it have been like to be Mary as she walked to the tomb that morning, spices in hand, grieving the loss of her very best friend and the man whom she believed would save her land from oppression? What would it have been like to see that stone rolled aside, the tomb empty? To meet an angel whose news would have been shocking, to say the least? And, finally, to hear <em>your</em> name spoken by someone who you were convinced would never speak again?<br />
<br />
What <strong>fear</strong>.<br />
What <strong>amazement</strong>.<br />
What <strong>joy</strong>.</div>
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<img align="none" height="390" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/William_Hole__Jesus_Appears_To_Mary_Magdalene.png" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 300px;" width="300" /></div>
<div style="font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding: 0px;">
I’ll be spending this day on the other side of the globe this year, Lord willing. Maybe I’ll even be able to produce a jumbled mess of words that sort of resemble, <a href="http://translate.google.com/#en/th/Happy%20Easter" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">“<strong>He is risen, indeed!”</strong></a> I’ll be living among a people who don’t know the meaning of the most important day in history. <em>Who don’t know the joy of having an Advocate who overcame death. </em><br />
<br />
I grew up in the church (as the <em>gone-to-church-my-whole-life</em> Christians say), so I never experienced <em>not</em> knowing who Jesus was.<br />
<br />
But I imagine finding out would be similar to <em>not</em> finding His body in the tomb. Putting to death your expectations from a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddhism" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">religion</a> meant to pave the road to peace. Placing your doubts about whether you’ll ever arrive at perfection in the burial chamber. Rolling the stone in front, sealing your own shame, guilt, and failure inside forever.<br />
<br />
And then <em>waking up</em> to find the tomb empty. And something, <em>Someone</em> who is far greater than anything you had ever hoped or dreamed – the embodiment of peace, eternal life Himself – standing before you, saying <strong>your name</strong>.</div>
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<strong>THE STUFF OF NEWS:</strong></div>
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<li>I met (most) of my Thailand team last weekend! We all met in Kansas City, MO for a few days to get to know each other; fly a kite; pick the brains of former missionaries to Thailand; consume lots of BBQ, stir fry, coffee, and Thai tea; talk about our expectations for the team (eek!); and pray over where God has us now and what He is preparing us to do. <span style="font-size: 11px;"><em>(Pictured below: women of Team Thailand: Marnee, me, Heather, Liz)</em></span><br /><br /> <img align="none" height="192" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/girls_pic.png" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 350px;" width="350" /><br /> </li>
<li><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">I had the blessing of seeing one of my World Race teammates get married </span><em style="line-height: 1.6em;">and</em><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">reconnecting with several of my friends from my WR squad. </span><br /><br /> <img align="none" src="http://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/1609734_10201752903251166_4280030684008816415_nd778c2.jpg" height="262" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 350px;" width="350" /><br /> </li>
<li>I pierced my nose… again.<br /><br /> <img align="none" height="266" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/10312405_10201752912211390_2413225362693955902_ned5725.jpg" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 200px;" width="200" /></li>
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<strong>THE STUFF OF PRAYER:</strong></div>
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<li>April is already a difficult month for many in Oklahoma who lost loved ones in the <a href="http://www.oklahomacitynationalmemorial.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">OKC bombing</a> 19 years ago, but poor health and death have become a more recent struggle for many others in my community and close social ties. Please pray for those who are mourning the <a href="http://wnow.worldnow.com/story/25287630/okc-woman-dies-suddenly-following-half-marathon" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">loss of Kaytie Joiner</a> and for God’s comfort and healing in the lives of close friends and their relatives profoundly struggling with health issues.</li>
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<li>Pray for my team as we continue to raise financial and prayer support and that our growth and trust in Christ will continue to increase.</li>
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<li>Pray for the Holy Spirit to continue to move in the hearts and lives of the Thai people, preparing them to hear the Gospel. </li>
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<tr><td class="mcnButtonContent" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 18px; padding: 16px; text-align: center;" valign="middle"><a class="mcnButton " href="http://avantministries.org/give/giving-options/" style="color: white; font-weight: bold; letter-spacing: 0px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank" title="Help Send Me to Thailand!">Help Send Me to Thailand!</a></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="mcnTextContent" style="color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22px; padding: 9px 18px;" valign="top"><strong>How was your Easter? Did you have any awesome revelations? What was the coolest thing you found in one of those plastic eggs? <a href="mailto:reagan.taylor@avmi.org" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank">Let me know!</a></strong></td></tr>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-58402689872450992022014-04-01T12:30:00.000-07:002014-06-22T14:23:57.093-07:00Real Talk (Seriously, Not a Joke)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://photographypainter.wordpress.com/2012/10/19/flowers-at-the-buddhas-feet/" target="_blank">Flowers at the Buddha's feet: Thailand</a></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: 24px;"><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">Happy first day of April!</span></span></h1>
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I promise nothing in this update will fool you in any way. I struggle every year on this particular day to remember not to fall for everything, so I won’t be the one to put you in that position. <strong>(But if someone else does, and it’s hilarious and worth sharing, I highly encourage you to tell me about it.)</strong></div>
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March has been sort of a <strong>whirlwind</strong> month for most of us, with weather going from blizzard to summertime heat to rain to ice to… wherever it ended up yesterday. Then there was spring break for those of you who still get those, then back-to-school woes for the kids of those of you who have those…<br /><br />For me, March was a beautiful month of <strong>opportunity</strong>. After spreading the word that<strong><em>yes, me going to Thailand for 5ish years is a real thing</em></strong>, I got to sit down with several people to tell them more about it. I shared my story. They shared theirs. We processed through how Jesus found us and where we each feel called. I showed them my <strong><em>incredibly</em></strong> fancy blue binder with words and pictures depicting my upcoming life in “the world”, as I like to call it. I shared stories about what God was already doing. And I invited them to be part of the team.<br /><br />I’ll be honest, I expected this whole support raising process to be a drag. I mean, who really wants to sit down with people they don’t know that well and ask them for money, right? But every time, <strong>every time, </strong>I walked away blessed and encouraged. These aren’t your everyday conversation topics – ones like God, and how you came to know Him, and cool stuff He’s doing in the world, and how we can all be a part of it. It isn’t everyday that someone confesses their struggles with God, the church, or their own spirituality. And it definitely isn’t everyday that we can sit in booths across from each other, eat spinach artichoke dip, and <strong>celebrate how God brought us from some point of devastation to realizing we actually need Him. </strong><br /><br />These are the conversations, the ones about things that matter, that bring forth<strong>awakening</strong>. <strong>Remembrance</strong>. <strong>Growth</strong>. These are the sort of <strong><em>jolts</em></strong> that call you out of the mundane, just-get-by kinds of days and empower you <strong>engage life</strong> rather than sit back and watch from a distance. Sharing yourself isn’t easy. But if we all come to the table knowing that we all have a little bit of baggage, a little bit of victory, a little bit of struggle, and a whole lot of redemption… <strong><em>Why does fear have to be a thing?</em></strong><br /><br /><strong>Have you had an <em>authentic</em> conversation recently? What was it like? Was it worth it? And how did it move you?</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://photographypainter.wordpress.com/2012/08/10/cycling-through-the-rice-fields-2/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_blank"><img align="none" height="339" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/dsc_5172cyclingthroughthericefields.jpg" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; text-decoration: none; width: 500px;" width="500" /></a><br /><br /><em><strong>Stuff to talk to the Lord about…</strong></em></div>
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<li><em>God is already present in Thailand. Pray that the Holy Spirit moves in the personal lives of the Thai people, preparing them to receive the Gospel that we (or someone else) will get to share with them!</em></li>
<li><em>Pray for believers in Thailand, that Jesus will empower them to share Him with their communities.</em></li>
<li><em>Pray for me, that I will continue to desire Christ and know Him more.</em></li>
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<br />As, always, I want to know… <strong>How can I pray for you?</strong></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-54332968677547711602014-03-10T07:22:00.000-07:002014-06-22T16:33:23.221-07:00twenty-six<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My 26<sup>th</sup> birthday wasn’t much of a <i>thing</i>. I went to church. I came home to a traditional Sunday roast lunch with my traditionally-gathered Sunday roast lunch family members. I ate a delicious not-so-traditional peanut butter pie. I opened presents. And then I went to work, where I hung out with self- or others-harming adolescents who, for the most part, kept destructive behavior to a minimum that evening. Thankfully. Because it was my birthday, and I was freaking entitled to be mildly worshiped… <i>at least.</i></span><br />
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Really, it was mostly just a <i>day</i>. Sort of a harsh anticlimax to what I thought would surely be the beginning of the <i>ohmygoshican’tbelievei’mactuallythisoldandistilldon’thavemycraptogether </i>season. But February 23<sup>rd</sup> came and went without much to say for itself, as if shrugging and commenting something apathetically on its way out like, “<i>Well, looks like everything is going to be pretty much the same."</i></span><br />
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I sat in a booth across from my cousin Morgan at Panera Bread about a week later. We both clasped hands around our coffee cups, catching up on lives and woes and new things over the last couple of months since we had seen each other. I had done a bit of introspection over those few days since the anniversary of my birth. I reflected on how, in the past, each birth year had gone by with a sense of failure because I hadn’t accomplished <i>this </i>or <i>that</i> by now. Remember that blog <a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/2011/02/26/on-being-23/">on being 23</a>? I recall being dumbfounded and ashamed that I hadn’t found “the one”, gotten a “real” job, figured out what I wanted to do with my life – all that being a white, middle-class, Christian American woman entails. Each early-twenty-something birthday passed with the hope of <i>Well, maybe next year…</i></span><br />
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“But year twenty-six is going to be different,” I told myself one day, and Morgan a few later. <b>“I declare that year twenty-six is going to be the year of <i>not </i>looking forward to the things that <i>haven’t been promised</i>; but instead, the things that <i>have</i> been promised."</b></span><br />
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Think about it.</span><br />
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Did God ever promise me a husband and family of my own? Well, no. <b>But He promised an <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/quicksearch/?quicksearch=adopt&qs_version=NIV">adoption as His daughter</a> into the beautiful and eternal family of Christ.</b> Did He ever promise me a fancy, secure job? Nope. <b>But He promised to <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+6%3A25-34&version=NIV">provide everything I need</a>.</b> What about the knowledge of definite plans for the rest of my life? Of course not. <b>But He promised that if I trusted Him, <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Proverbs%203:5-6&version=NIV">He would direct my path</a>.</b></span><br />
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Or the harder realization… <b>Does God promise to <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2037:4&version=NIV">give the desires of my heart if I delight myself in Him</a>? </b>He sure does, but… <b> He doesn’t promise those <i>in this lifetime.</i></b></span><br />
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Ever read <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=hebrews+11&version=NIV">Hebrews 11</a>? The “Hall of Faith,” as the Christians say. A chronicle of the ways in which sixteen people showed exemplary faith for the glory of God… <strong>"</strong><b><a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=hebrews+11%3A39&version=NIV">yet none of them received what had been promised</a>."</b> Jesus. The promise of the Messiah. Not received in their earthly lifetime, but certainly known in the eternal.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I guess it's about time I approach the brink of a mature and peaceful acceptance that <strong>getting older and wiser – and more like Jesus – doesn’t entitle me to the pleasures of this world I often believe I deserve</strong>.</span><br />
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<em><strong><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But His blessings are far sweeter than my expectations anyway.</span></strong></em><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, </span><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">cheers to 26 years. </strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Here's to every following birthday </span><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">not</strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> including the anticipation of a sort of arrival. Here's to </span><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">not</strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> pining away for burdens I was never meant to take on (for now). Here's to actually being, I don't know… </span><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">content</strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">. But not content, exactly. </span><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thriving</strong><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">. Where I am. Right now. Here's to learning how to cook before I meet a guy I'll have to cook for and working part-time jobs to fund the things I actually care about doing. Here's to saying </span><i style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></i><strong style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>yes</em></strong><em style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </em><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">to God's promises and living without expectation in regard to all the rest.</span></div>
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Because <strong>now</strong> is enough.</span></div>
Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-2721125489632745212014-03-03T13:00:00.000-08:002014-06-22T14:18:28.965-07:00Thailand Q&A<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 12px; line-height: 22px;">Agriculture is the main economic activity in the Isan region of Thailand. These women, like many others, sell their fresh produce in the marketplace. </span><a href="http://photographypainter.wordpress.com/blog/page/8/" style="background-color: white; color: #6dc6dd; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 12px; line-height: 22px; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">Photo source.</a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: 24px;">One-sided conversations are boring.</span></h1>
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So I want to give a big thanks to those of who joined in by sharing what makes you come alive with me. From playing music, to sharing Jesus with kids, to loving hurting families, <strong>God is using <em>you</em> as His hands and feet on this earth.</strong> And that’s pretty dang cool. If you didn’t respond, I’d still love to know about <strong>you</strong> and what <strong>you</strong> are passionate about.<br /><br />In my last update, I told you about the opportunity I have to be a real, live, full-time missionary in Thailand. <strong>(No idea what I’m talking about? Read it <a href="http://eepurl.com/Ns8Lj" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">here</a>.) </strong>Now I want to add a little more flesh to those minimal details and hopefully answer a few of the most common questions…</div>
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<li><strong><em>Are you going with the same organization as you did for the <a href="http://reagantaylor.theworldrace.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; font-weight: normal; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">World Race</a>?</em></strong><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">Nope, that was <a href="https://www.adventures.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">Adventures in Missions</a>.</span><span style="line-height: 1.6em;"> (They’re super cool too, though - check them out if you’re looking for mostly short-term missions opportunities!) This time, I’ll be with <a href="http://avantministries.org/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">Avant Ministries</a></span><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">. They’ve been around for 120 years, sending teams of missionaries to places in the world that have had, at most, almost zero exposure to the Good News.</span><br /> </li>
<li><em><strong>How long will you be gone?</strong></em><br />I’ll be over there 5-7 years <em>(whoa!)</em>, but I’ll be able to come back for short stints within that time frame. </li>
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<li><strong><em>Are you going by yourself or with a team?</em></strong><br /><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">No way am I going alone – I’d just get lost all the time. I’ll be on a team with all these people!</span></li>
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<img align="none" height="170" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/Neudorfs.PNG" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 170px;" width="170" /> <img align="none" height="170" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/430977_10150751130447806_926385500_n.jpg" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 170px;" width="170" /> <img align="none" height="170" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/mailchimp.jpg" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; width: 170px;" width="170" /></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #606060; font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 11px; line-height: 22px;"><em> Tim, Alex, Dominic, & Marnee Neudorf Elizabeth McCall Heather & Matt Rittscher</em></span></div>
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<li><strong><em>Will you have to learn the language?</em></strong><br /><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">Yep! For the first year or so, my team and I will be learning Thai at a language school in Bangkok, the capital of Thailand. </span>มันจะเป็นเรื่องยากมาก</li>
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<li><strong><em>What exactly will you be doing?</em></strong><br /><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">After language school, we’ll be moving farther northeast to the Isan region of Thailand, where we’ll build relationships with Thai people who have likely never heard the Gospel. As we share the Truth about Jesus with them, we will pray and work to form churches among these new Thai believers. If you want to get fancy with the terminology, we’ll be doing something called <em>S</em></span><em style="line-height: 1.6em;">hort-Cycle Church Planting</em><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">. Feel free to check out a more extensive description of that <a href="http://avantministries.org/about/short-cycle/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">here</a> </span><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">if you feel like geeking out, but don’t worry – I’ll tell you more about it later.</span></li>
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<li><strong><em>When do you leave?</em></strong><br />The official “launch” date is still in the works, but it’s looking like sometime between December 2014 and January 2015.</li>
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<li><strong><em>Will you have access to the Internet?</em></strong><br /><span style="line-height: 1.6em;">Yep </span>–<span style="line-height: 1.6em;"> praise God that the Internet can be found in the Third World too. So, no fear, you'll still </span>have a steady stream of<span style="line-height: 1.6em;"> food pictures blowing up your <a href="http://instagram.com/reagan_taylor" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">Instagram</a>. Like this one.</span></li>
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<span style="color: #6dc6dd; line-height: 1.6em; word-wrap: break-word;"><a href="http://thetimecrunchedtraveler.com/2013/02/07/thailands-most-interesting-markets/" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self"><img align="none" height="300" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/phuket2.jpg" style="border: 0px; height: auto !important; outline: none; text-decoration: none; width: 300px;" width="300" /></a></span></div>
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I have so appreciated your encouragement and excitement about what God is going to do in Thailand. Would you be willing to <strong>pray alongside me</strong> as I prepare to go and for the hearts of the Thais already there? I am specifically looking for at least <strong>5 people </strong>to commit to praying for me and my team on a weekly basis. This thing definitely won’t fly without others partnering with us, seeking favor from the Father on our behalf. If that’s something you’re excited about, please <a href="mailto:reagan.taylor@avmi.org?subject=I%20love%20praying!" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">send me an e-mail</a> to let me know!<br /><br />Several of you have said <strong>you know people who care about Thailand</strong>. Maybe they’re really into missions, or they live there now, or they’ve ridden an elephant at some point – whatever the reason, that’s awesome! If you think they might be interested in learning more about what my team will be doing there, feel free to <a href="mailto:reagan.taylor@avmi.org?subject=Tell%20this%20person%20about%20Thailand%20stuff!" style="color: #6dc6dd; word-wrap: break-word;" target="_self">send me their info</a> or just <strong>pass this along</strong> to them!<br /><br />Alright, that was a lot of information… But it’s exciting when things are happening, and there is stuff to share. So, tell me... If we were having this conversation at Starbucks, and I just told you <em>all that stuff</em> about my life, and now my mouth is tired and it’s your turn to talk for the next 10 minutes… Tell me, <strong>what’s God stirring up in <em>your</em> life?</strong></div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-35296392291054059112014-02-21T04:19:00.000-08:002014-06-22T16:35:44.464-07:00Coffee Date<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Let’s sit down for a cup of coffee. Or tea, or hot chocolate, whatever you like. Wrap your fingers around your mug, soaking in the warmth of your preferred comfort beverage, a sharp but pleasant contrast to the chilly weather outside. Lean back in your big, cushioned chair, inhaling the candle scent of… what’s your favorite? Vanilla? Cinnamon? Fresh linen? Let it stimulate your senses, conjuring up thoughts and dreams you may have set aside long ago for more practical things.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Because, for now, I want to talk about things that aren’t so practical.</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What is your calling?</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Has anyone ever asked you before?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What’s the thing that sets you on fire? That niggling thought of <i>what could be</i>, the issue that keeps you up at night? What has God awakened in your soul?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe it’s kids living on the streets of a land oceans away. Abandoned, helpless, hungry, your arms long to hold them and your heart longs to love them, breathing affirmation and the reality of something better to come. Maybe it’s the professional women who wander through life in a haze, wondering if there is any meaning to the day in and day out, keeping of books, laundering of clothes, scheduling of appointments, handling of budgets, securing of relationships – but ever alone. Maybe it’s writing music or researching the cure for breast cancer or saving the killer whales at Sea World.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sit on it for a minute. Allow it to stir you. Reflect on how it began, where the journey has taken you.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">May I tell you mine?</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have made it my ambition to go where Christ has not been named.</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It all started at Camp. The experiencing life beyond the Bible Belt, the coming into contact with kids who didn’t grow up singing “Jesus Loves the Little Children” or having parents who kissed them goodnight. The realizing… <i>Oh, I have the Message that matters. And the ability to <b>tell them about it.</b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So I did.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And God woke me up to a passion I didn’t know I had.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This started me down the uncomfortable and dangerous path that is… <i>Well, I have seen. <b>And now I am responsible.</b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I volunteered in youth groups. I got back to the very basics with my small group of high school girls: <b><i>Why</i></b><i> did Jesus have to die for us to be saved? <b>What</b> does being “saved” even mean? </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I loved teaching, I really did. But my heart wandered elsewhere, to the places where the name of Jesus had scarcely been uttered. Countries far, far away.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I spent eleven nomadic months in these places, growing into a state of dependence, a realization that I could never change the world on my own. I saw the hunger – physical, spiritual, emotional. And I was never the same. Trusting the Lord to be my strength and my guide, that was the key.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Having dabbled in enough wanderlust to satiate me for awhile, I asked God to open up a door for something less short-term. And he did.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Imagine.</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Imagine growing up in a place where the name of Jesus had never been spoken or heard. Where your parents encouraged you to dedicate your worship to various gods of gold or stone. Where your sole ambition, besides maintaining your existence, is to gain perfect peace, <i>nirvana</i>, through giving to temples, feeding monks, and praising lifeless idols. A place where the produce of the soil is low, but the number of people who believe the Truth is <i>vastly</i> lower.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is the province of Isan in the country of Thailand.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For the past 120 years, international missionary organization <a href="http://avantministries.org/">Avant Ministries</a> sought out these kinds of places to plant thriving, Christ-centered churches where none exist. They invited me to be a part of the team they will be sending to Thailand, where the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are so few. <b>I have been appointed to be a real, live, full-time missionary.</b> To learn a new language, adopt a new culture, make new friends, tell them about Jesus, and watch the Holy Spirit transform their lives.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Pretty cool, right?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ll leave it at that for now, but I’m excited to tell you more… soon.</span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For real, though, I want to know: What sets <b>your</b> heart on fire? </span></i></div>
Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-82239332914310992682013-12-13T10:20:00.000-08:002014-06-18T11:51:21.643-07:00When I Think of FreedomI’ve had this girlish fantasy for a few years now. It’s a little vain, maybe, but the desire remains. You know those photos or commercials you see of women in flowing white dresses, running across green, flower-clad meadows? I want a picture of myself being that woman. I want to wear a long, wispy dress that fans out all around me as I twirl in circles with my eyes closed, arms outstretched, palms facing the sky, head upturned, with a smile welcoming the sunbeams that kiss my face in response. I want to laugh in elation at the wonder and joy of life. There are no bounds to my meadow. Trees dot the landscape here and there, but there are no mountains or forests that enclose it, caging me in.<br/><br/><i> </i><br/><br/><i><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/367-angry_child.jpg"><br/></a> <a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/525x298xsummer-woman-field.jpg.pagespeed.ic_.k7bYc0MKvm.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-468" alt="525x298xsummer-woman-field.jpg.pagespeed.ic.k7bYc0MKvm" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/525x298xsummer-woman-field.jpg.pagespeed.ic_.k7bYc0MKvm.jpg" width="525" height="298" /></a></i><br/><br/><i> </i><br/><br/>I want to feel free and confident – not the kind of confident that comes with lots of people telling you how awesome you are, or that you’re really funny, or that you should write a book or become a counselor. Rather, the confidence that comes with a steadfast faith in the Giver of your identity. And this confidence is hard to come by for me because I look for my identity in all the wrong things. Like other people. Because, at the end of the day, one of my greatest desires is for people to know me. Really know me. Know me and love me in such an impossible way that, after they’ve failed me a few/lot of times, I remember again that I really just want them to <b>be</b> Jesus.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>I want Jesus in all the people from whom I seek attention and affirmation. I want perfect pursuit. Perfect, servant-hearted love. The kind that makes me feel safe, like I’m not an annoying toddler who keeps spilling her milk or making a mess of the pretty table arrangement or being too loud when important things are happening. I want Jesus in someone to look at me in my mess, pick me up, and wrap me up in their arms, laughing at how cute I am just because I’m alive. And I want Jesus in someone to hold me close against their chest and hum soothing melodies and sing songs over me. And I want, well, <i>Him</i> to speak life over my life and hold me in His arms and stroke my hair until I fall asleep. Secure, blissful, peaceful rest.<br/><br/> <br/><br/><i><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/baby_520.jpg"><img alt="baby_520" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/baby_520.jpg" width="520" height="329" /></a></i><br/><br/> <br/><br/>I recently started working in a psychiatric hospital/residential treatment center. I work in one of the children’s units, where kids enter in a state of crisis. Most of them have some kind of abusive background, and many are self-harming and suicidal. In order to protect the kids and/or ourselves from various forms of danger, we sometimes have to put them in therapeutic holds. One of my coworkers calls it “wrapping them up,” this action of restraining their arms behind their backs and seating them on the ground until they can calm down, process, and remember that there are coping skills that don’t involve stabbing their peers with pencils or punching door handles. And once we feel certain that the child’s response to the situation will look different and better than before, we communicate that it’s time to slowly get up, verbally process through what happened, and return to the normal day’s activities.<br/><br/> <br/><br/><i><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/367-angry_child.jpg"><img alt="367-angry_child" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/367-angry_child.jpg" width="447" height="315" /></a></i><br/><br/> <br/><br/>When I think about the concept of freedom, all of these pictures feel vaguely familiar, like I’ve been in each of them at one point or another. And it all makes me wonder if freedom comes in different forms. It’s a woman dancing in a field without limits or a baby sleeping in a secure embrace or a kid who took freedom too far and needs to be redirected to a better expression of it – for her good. And I wonder if freedom is sometimes accessing the liberty of saying <i>yes</i> but also embracing the maturity in saying <i>no</i>.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>Rob Bell said something like that in <i>Velvet Elvis</i>, writing that “Freedom is not having everything we crave, it’s being able to go without the things we crave and being OK with it.”<br/><br/> <br/><br/>That makes sense to me, because it tells me that when I’m free, I’m not a slave to anything.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>I stumbled upon a verse awhile back that paints the perfect Scripture picture of my fantasy. Psalm 119:45 in the ESV says, <i>“and I shall walk in a wide place, for I have sought your precepts.” </i>In the NIV, it states, <i>“I will walk about in freedom.”</i><br/><br/> <br/><br/>I feel like I’ve been drifting around pretty aimlessly these past couple of months. It makes me tired. Tired of paving my own road to freedom and sucking at it.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>It’s kind of ironic to me that pursuing holy boundaries – following the steps of the Maker – would lead to the real thing, the freedom that is pure and good and confident and safe. Something about denying yourself and taking up your cross, right? And even though I still mostly <i>get </i>it, the rebellious child in me wants to buck against authority and do what I want.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>Or get picked up and rocked to sleep.<br/><br/> <br/><br/><i>When I awake, I will see you face to face and be satisfied. Psalm 17:15</i><br/><br/> Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-55965537199687245222013-11-20T11:52:00.000-08:002014-06-18T11:51:21.569-07:00For MackenzieI cradled your tiny body in my arms during the wee hours of a Tuesday morning. You slept peacefully as I whispered words of prayer and promise over you.<br/><br/> <br/><br/><i>You are wanted. </i><br/><br/><i>You are loved.</i><br/><br/><i>You are chosen.</i><br/><br/> <br/><br/>It wasn’t easy, letting you go. Your birth mommy’s tears fell on your little swaddled form as she held you in her arms, probably full of thoughts of what could be, what would not be, and what would be so much greater because she chose you over herself.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>We passed you around the circle of those who had to say goodbye, at least for now. We held you close, not wanting to forget a single feature of your face, not wanting to waste a single second of the final ones in which you were ours. We told you how much we love you. How precious you are to us. Words of truth and life you certainly can’t understand right now, but words that will be forever true, words we want you to carry in your heart and soul every single day of your existence.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>As you get older, baby girl, I hope you never face any lies of rejection, abandonment, and unwantedness surrounding the first weeks of your little life. I hope you are one day able to fathom how eternally changed we have been by welcoming you into the world. How much we absolutely adore and desire the very best for you.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>Mackenzie, you are unbelievably wanted. Loved. Chosen. By us. By the ones who have the great blessing of raising you from infancy to womanhood. But, most of all, by the One who created you.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>I can’t wait for the day when you can stand up and make your own decision to pursue the One who pursued you first. The One who knew you in your innermost being before even we did. Who loved you before our hearts were captured by you. Whose hands fashioned you together before ours got to hold you. He is your Father, Savior, Lover, Redeemer, Best Friend. I can’t wait to tell you about Him, to see your eyes light up when you comprehend the Gift He gave you. I can’t wait for you to feel the depth of a love that is so much greater than anyone else can give you.<br/><br/> <br/><br/>Mackenzie, if you’re ever in doubt, always know you have a family whose moon you hung, as well as a Father who will scoop you up in His arms and sing these now-familiar words over you:<br/><br/> <br/><br/><i>I want you. </i><br/><br/><i>I love you.</i><br/><br/><i>I choose you.</i><br/><br/> <br/><br/> <br/><br/><img class="alignnone" alt="" src="https://scontent-a-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1450326_10200823883266247_1172058315_n.jpg" width="400" height="400" /><br/><br/><img class="alignnone" alt="" src="https://scontent-a-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1469775_10200823883226246_2057508446_n.jpg" width="400" height="400" /><br/><br/><img class="alignnone" alt="" src="https://scontent-b-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/994647_10200674263565848_1787546401_n.jpg" width="400" height="400" /><br/><br/><img class="alignnone" alt="" src="https://scontent-a-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/1455905_10200823883186245_1937367455_n.jpg" width="400" height="400" />Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-79062382994130130552013-10-26T13:00:00.000-07:002014-06-22T14:12:08.863-07:00Back from the Dead<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Oh, hi!</h1>
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Reagan's not dead; she's surely alive...</h3>
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Suddenly, I get back to the real world, and I forget that maintaining contact with others still matters. Oops. Thanks to those of you who have sent the, “Hey, where the heck are you – did you make it out of Alaska alive?” e-mails to remind me to start updating again.<br /><br />Well, I’ve been back to 2 months. Since then, I’ve done a significant amount of sleeping and catching up with people I like and meeting new people and getting more involved at my church and a little bit of road tripping. The usual. </div>
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This is an excerpt from the "Missionary-ish Tales" e-news. Read the rest <a href="http://us6.campaign-archive1.com/?u=ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db&id=b99a354b4e" target="_blank">here</a>.</div>
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Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-23358565268880916122013-10-25T12:53:00.000-07:002014-06-18T11:51:21.561-07:00The Art of Letting Go<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/open-door-149.jpg"><img class="aligncenter" alt="open-door-149" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/open-door-149-1024x1024.jpg" width="400" height="400" /></a></p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><i> <a href="http://strengthforthesoul.com/blog/how-do-you-know-if-god-is-the-one-opening-the-door/">Original image source</a></i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I walked past the open door, my travel mug refilled, ready to once again plug away at figuring out how the next few months of my life would look after leaving Echo Ranch Bible Camp.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>But the outside beckoned me. Maybe it was You. I don’t know what it was, but something told me not to go back downstairs, isolated, a slave to the Internet’s grand and varied offers for what my future could look like.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>So I went.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">This summer, with all my intents and purposes of growing, improving, and letting go, was exactly not that kind of season. It was a season of holding on. Holding on to <i>what if?</i>s in a recently ended relationship, projected hopes of a new Christian community, expectations of my stunning performance as a leader, and above all, the confidence that I would know exactly what I would be doing with my life once it was all over.</p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/A_Shadow_on_the_Lighted_Path_by_Silas_Cova.jpg"><img class="aligncenter" alt="A_Shadow_on_the_Lighted_Path_by_Silas_Cova" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/A_Shadow_on_the_Lighted_Path_by_Silas_Cova.jpg" width="400" height="400" /></a></p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><i> <a href="http://silas-cova.deviantart.com/art/A-Shadow-on-the-Lighted-Path-12736854">Original image source</a></i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I walked past the Purple Bench. I had originally intended on stopping there. Maybe sitting down and enjoying the view of… the bath house? Or maybe just the feeling of sitting in the sun. But I kept walking. I didn’t really know why. Maybe I would go lie down in the middle of the sports field. Soak up the rays that aren’t easy to come by during a summer in Southeast Alaska. The path there was a little to the left.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">God had called me here. There haven’t been many times in my life when I could say that with confidence, but I knew it to be true now. But as the weeks progressed, I watched my expectations crumble before my eyes. I was a seasoned professional at this. If any experience should have hammered that truth into my brain, it would have been the <a href="http://reagantaylor.theworldrace.org">Race</a>. But I thought these were more realistic. Instead, loneliness seeped in when quality time and vulnerability were scarce. Feelings of failure abounded when my attempts to fulfill my role fell short. Uncertainty, anxiety, and depression crept up on me as I considered the possibilities and unknowns of my future again… and again… and again. And, to top it all off,<b> nobody liked <a href="http://reagantaylor.theworldrace.org/?filename=mwen-renmen-haiti">feedback</a>.</b><b> </b></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">I spent the summer being everywhere but here, and I knew it. I felt like I had already thrown away opportunities to make the most of it, and nothing had even come out of all my fretting about what to do next. I tossed, turned, and lay in a miserable heap of pity party in my bed one afternoon during the final few weeks, mulling it all over. I listened to Jesus music and asked Him what heck I was supposed to do next.</p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">And then I saw myself, scrambling around and trying to devise all these plans for what I would do. But I wasn’t scrambling on the ground. I was in the palm of a very large hand, and I didn’t even realize it. I ran from one side of the palm to another, never noticing the fruitlessness of my efforts to do what I thought was best. Because the hand was attached to Someone. A wrist, to an arm, to a chest, to a neck to the head… of my Father. My Father who was watching me run to and fro and sort of smiling knowingly. As I looked in at myself, my scrambly little body, I thought, “If I were God, I would think that was so ridiculous. Why wouldn't I just trust Him, that He sees everything, and He's holding me, and He's in control? Why wouldn't I just rest, secure in His hand?"</p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/tumblr_mqcc0nRf5y1qax7z4o1_500.jpg"><img class="aligncenter" alt="tumblr_mqcc0nRf5y1qax7z4o1_500" src="http://reagantaylorgoes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/tumblr_mqcc0nRf5y1qax7z4o1_500.jpg" width="400" height="400" /></a></p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://glengreen.tumblr.com"><i>Original image source</i></a></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><b> </b></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I turned right. Why, I really didn’t know, but I didn’t really think about it. Until I saw it and remembered. The tiny little camp house referred to as the Love Shack. </i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I had frequented this little home during my previous summer here because that is where my “camp mom”, Lyn, had lived. We had talked together of things that mattered as she mixed together our favorite lemon drink concoction. She told me her story. And I marveled at how a woman so formerly broken could now be so full of love, grace, and joy. </i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i> </i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">So often, my spirit’s response to a gentle Truth that sets it reeling is a simple, “Oh.”</p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">I felt awakened. Affirmed. But not yet satisfied. I knew there was more to trusting Him than just knowing I should do it. It had to do with knowing Him. Loving Him. But what did that really mean, truly loving God with all my heart and soul and mind and strength? I had seen others live that way. I had been reading about it recently in one of the many books hailed by my World Race leaders. I knew God was trustworthy, and I knew I loved Him. But did I love Him like <i>that</i>?</p><br/><p style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://scontent-b-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1385943_10200656027629961_449464896_n.jpg" width="400" height="400" /></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><b> </b></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I smiled as I walked up the porch steps and opened the door. After making sure it was actually vacant, I settled into the couch where Lyn had shared her life with me four years ago. Glancing around me, I noticed a book on the side table. </i>The Art of Loving God<i>. </i><i> </i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I read the whole thing. </i><i>I cried. </i><i>I thanked. </i><i>I prayed.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><i>I released.</i></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;"><em></em>I'm still processing through these kinds of things. <strong>Intimacy. Trust. Love. </strong>But in those still, sweet moments, I knew my Father was reaching down to me -- for me -- and saying, <em>"Here, let Me help you understand a little better." </em> Maybe the point isn't <strong>me</strong> knowing all the things or being enough or getting it right or, you know, in control. <strong>Just give. it. up. </strong><em> (And haven't I already written like 56 blogs about this?)</em></p><br/><p style="text-align: left;">What about you? What kinds of things has God helped you understand in the midst of your own Crazy Land?</p>Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6194848506835263861.post-90001131205607225712013-09-05T19:03:00.000-07:002014-06-18T11:51:21.487-07:00It Is Finished<h1>It is finished.</h1><br/>Echo Ranch’s final camp week of the summer ended on Friday, August 9<sup>th</sup>, with 10- to 11-year-old kiddos on tractors bound for the beginning of their 2-mile hike out, waving goodbye to the canoes, the zipline, and everything else.<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/1231302_10200379607079620_2022732328_n4bff29.jpg" width="400" height="400" align="none" /><br/><br/>It was such a good week. Of course, there were a couple of mishaps with campers not getting along, rolling their eyes instead of following directions, and burying their watches in the sand for safekeeping (and forgetting to mark the spot)… But, overall, God provided a week for us to really enjoy the kids without trying too hard.<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="http://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/27888_10200379606999618_573258190_na62f8c.jpg" width="400" height="400" align="none" /><br/><br/>Although I didn’t counsel that week, the Broncos are definitely my favorite age group. They’re the kids who are still young enough to think you’re awesome and not be embarrassed to open up about their lives and ask all the questions, but they’re old enough to have relatively intelligent conversations and <em>understand</em> the Gospel. As usual, a few of the kids came to camp with zero/very little church background and no knowledge of Jesus. One of them, Thomas, was attentive, wide-eyed, and inquisitive after every chapel message. He absolutely soaked it up. I honestly don’t know whether he made a decision to trust Jesus by the end of the week, but I can say that boy knew the News was <em>Good</em>.<br/><br/>Another boy struggled with other questions, like how to find “Oppossums” in the Bible. After a bit of questioning from his counselors, they finally figured out he was talking about Psalms.<br/><br/>While I didn’t get to counsel in a cabin, I did get the opportunity to preach at chapel! Our weekly message series always (usually) hits on these topics:<br/><br/><em>1. Who is God?<br/>2. What is sin?<br/>3. Who is Jesus?<br/>4. Salvation<br/>5. Community & Evangelism</em><br/><br/>I spoke on #3, which basically consisted of throwing up a PowerPoint slideshow of about 20 pictures of stories about Jesus – and just talking about them. It was awesome. Of course, a lot of the pictures were a little cheesy…<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/b04.jpg" width="300" height="400" align="none" /><br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/www_St_Takla_org___Miracles_of_Jesus_34.jpg" width="300" height="225" align="none" /><br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/Ressuscitou1.jpg" width="300" height="442" align="none" /><br/><br/>But the kids listened. And they were amazed. It’s easy to forget just how incredible each detail of Jesus’ life on earth was until you make yourself a character in the story, imagining you were seeing it with your own eyes. Seriously, Jesus raised a dead man to life? He walked on the surface of the sea? He made the blind see and the lame walk? Most of us have heard those stories a million times, but our jaws would be dropping if we saw Him doing those kinds of things today. <em>(Want to know something cool? <a href="http://reagantaylor.theworldrace.org/?filename=the-god-who-hears" target="_self">That stuff still happens</a>.)</em><br/><br/>The last picture of my slideshow sermon was of “The Last Supper.” I asked the kids if they knew the name of the painting. One of them yelled out “The Mona Lisa!”... I tried not to laugh too hard.<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/The_Last_Supper_Restored_Da_Vinci.jpg" width="500" height="236" align="none" /><br/><br/>Echo Ranch’s fulltime staff is entering into a new and exciting season. Most of their heavy, intentional children’s ministry is focused on the summer camps, but they are seeing more and more that discipleship in the “off” season is absolutely essential. During the last few weeks of camp, the director met with the counselors and brainstormed about how to "do discipleship" effectively. Many kids need and desire this kind of spiritual leadership in their lives year-round, not just during the summer.<br/><br/>That’s where I am, too. I’ve been home for just over a week now, and I am deeply craving discipleship in my own life. I still don’t know what my next steps are. Many of the counselors are in the same boat, and the failure to walk off our destination flights with a five-year plan in hand was a source of anxiety for some of us. In spite of my inability to control every aspect of the future, though, God has been reminding me that my fulfillment will never come from my performance and circumstances, but in knowing and resting in Him.<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="http://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/1175389_10200379606959617_768871127_n31bef4.jpg" width="400" height="400" align="none" /><br/><br/>As you read this and think about the kids and the counselors and the staff and me, please be lifting all of us up to the Father. Ministry and discipleship, these things aren’t meant to be simply a “season”. Pray that He opens our eyes to what He is doing and that we recognize His invitation for us to join Him. Pray that for yourselves. You won’t regret it.<br/><br/>Thank you all for your support and encouragement this summer. I’ll keep you posted as God leads me to what He has next!<br/><br/><img class="aligncenter" alt="" src="https://gallery.mailchimp.com/ffe387bcfb9bff3ea063f47db/images/1175158_10153159340300375_876392033_n.jpg" width="500" height="332" align="none" />Reagan Taylorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07806636048678114437noreply@blogger.com1