Wednesday, November 20, 2013

For Mackenzie

I cradled your tiny body in my arms during the wee hours of a Tuesday morning.  You slept peacefully as I whispered words of prayer and promise over you.

 

You are wanted.

You are loved.

You are chosen.

 

It wasn’t easy, letting you go.  Your birth mommy’s tears fell on your little swaddled form as she held you in her arms, probably full of thoughts of what could be, what would not be, and what would be so much greater because she chose you over herself.

 

We passed you around the circle of those who had to say goodbye, at least for now.  We held you close, not wanting to forget a single feature of your face, not wanting to waste a single second of the final ones in which you were ours.  We told you how much we love you.  How precious you are to us.  Words of truth and life you certainly can’t understand right now, but words that will be forever true, words we want you to carry in your heart and soul every single day of your existence.

 

As you get older, baby girl, I hope you never face any lies of rejection, abandonment, and unwantedness surrounding the first weeks of your little life.  I hope you are one day able to fathom how eternally changed we have been by welcoming you into the world.  How much we absolutely adore and desire the very best for you.

 

Mackenzie, you are unbelievably wanted.  Loved.  Chosen.  By us.  By the ones who have the great blessing of raising you from infancy to womanhood.  But, most of all, by the One who created you.

 

I can’t wait for the day when you can stand up and make your own decision to pursue the One who pursued you first.  The One who knew you in your innermost being before even we did.  Who loved you before our hearts were captured by you.  Whose hands fashioned you together before ours got to hold you.  He is your Father, Savior, Lover, Redeemer, Best Friend.  I can’t wait to tell you about Him, to see your eyes light up when you comprehend the Gift He gave you.  I can’t wait for you to feel the depth of a love that is so much greater than anyone else can give you.

 

Mackenzie, if you’re ever in doubt, always know you have a family whose moon you hung, as well as a Father who will scoop you up in His arms and sing these now-familiar words over you:

 

I want you.

I love you.

I choose you.