Monday, October 31, 2011

Belonging

I keep wanting to write a post about Training Camp.  But, for whatever reason (and there are a few), I just can't get around to it.  It was great, and horrible, and long, and restless, and beautiful, and eye-opening, and cold, and awesome.  I learned and experienced and was.  And now I'm back, and I can't believe that in only 2 short months, I'll be seeing those crazies again.  And we'll be doing it for real.  Weird.

So, instead of posting my own blog about it, for now I'll just direct you to those of a few squadmates, because they're pretty neat.  Hit the nail right on the head.

Justin Orr:  "Puff, Puss, Pass!"
Leah Malone:  "These World Race People are CRAZY." 
(That picture of the tent village?  I took that.)
Suzanne Bradford:  "So how was training camp?"

On a mostly different note, I'll be packing up all my belongings and heading home to Oklahoma this week.  I have a lot of feelings about that, and many of them are nice.  But it's going to be hard.  I've moved a few times over the past couple of years, and eventually I've begun to feel like I could live everywhere because I don't belong anywhere.  For long, anyway.  My frustration about this culminated in a prayer... partially inspired by the lyrics to Switchfoot's "Where I Belong":



"Until I die, I’ll sing these songs
On the shores of Babylon
Still looking for a home
In a world where I belong"

 



God, where is home for me these days?  I can see myself right now, standing on the shores of a land that isn’t my own.  This isn’t my home, this strange place where the people I trust the most prove unworthy, where the love void never finds its fullness, where too much is never enough.  Where the line between love and codependency remains ambiguous, where the battle between perfection and reality rages, and the perfection to which we were called remains unattainable in our own power. 
 
I don’t feel at home here, always in transition, floating, wandering, a nomad, never finding a place to land.  I drag the memories, the failures, the emptiness behind me.  You never really do start over.
 
Where do I belong? 
 
Eternity is written on my heart.  I was not made for this place, where nothing ever lasts.  We were not meant for goodbyes.  Facing the end of good things, those things that remind us of the greatness to come, those tastes of heaven.  The world is rigged.  We are deceived, expecting all that is beautiful here to be it, the point of arrival.  And surprised each time it isn’t.
 
We have that hunger for a world beyond ourselves, that place where all that we long for is just a little more present.  The kingdom.  Exposure.  Truth.  Life.  Standing on our own two feet, naked, without judgment.  Without fear. 
 
Yes, we all have crap.  But “God likes it that way, because live things poop.”  ‘Dump it here,’ He says.  ‘Lie exposed, all of you.’  Maybe that’s what belonging feels like.  Maybe that’s what home is supposed to be.



Do you ever struggle to feel like you belong somewhere?  What do you do about it?

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Meet Team Mosaic!

Well, Training Camp for all three January 2012 sqads is officially over.  It was a tough, emotional, but incredible week.  I'm excited to announce the people with whom I will be spending the first several months of my World Race journey:  Suzanne Bradford, Rebekah Clark, Matt Blair, Rachel Williams, and Tyler Hamilton!  




One of my fellow Mosaic teammates, Tyler, wrote a blog about some of our first experiences as a team.  Here it is (with a few changes).  Enjoy!


Preparation and Pain



After C Squad split into our amazing groups, we felt the Holy Spirit pulling on our hearts to share and spend time with somebody outside of camp when we went to go bond and eat dinner. The Lord has brought a lot of new passion and vision into our lives during this long but energy-filled week. The stories of our lives are no longer just individual experiences but now have intertwined into an experience of a life time that we will live for the next 11 months, starting in January. Our group's new name was a very important part of creating our new team's identity, and we all wanted a name that would reflect each of our hearts passion for this adventure and individually combine our recent changes that we have felt. So after about an hour of discussion and brainstorming, after the bathroom I come back to the table to hear a very loud and enthusiastic "MOSAIC!!!" This was a new and creative name that we felt encompassed all of our ideals and feelings the Spirit had shown us. 



Our new group traveled outside of our camp on Friday because we felt the spirit moving in our hearts to go spend time with our new group and share the love that we have been blessed with to another child of God. After settling for a delicious scoop of ice cream, we sat down with our new groups and bonded for about two hours. Before leaving, we decided to ask for directions to the closet southern BBQ restaurant. The manager at the ice cream shop, Chris, was more the willing to show us to his family's favorite place to grub. Chris is 22 and living at home with his family to take care of his sick father. For the past couple years, Chris has struggled with bills, family, and the place in his life where he felt God was leading him to. We felt the pain in his heart and the challenges he has been facing day by day. So we told him where we were from and what God was doing in our lives through this World Race mission. "God wants you and will place you where he plans if you are willing," I said to Chris through the small service window at the ice cream shop. Chris was a huge encouragement  to me because our stories related so well together. We prayed a Spirit-filled prayer with Chris, asking him to trust and challenge God for him to look into something like to World Race. This experience has warmed my heart and provided me with a beginning look at what God has in store for us in the next 11 months!!!  God is LOVE!!!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Dear College Me

This post doesn't really have anything to do with the World Race, but I thought it was worth sharing...

I graduated from college almost two years ago.  Two years!  So much has happened since then -- all ultimately great things -- but I still often reflect on what I would have done differently if I could go back and do my 18-22 years over again.  

I just got back from visiting a good friend who lives a block away from my alma mater.  We decided to take a walk across the campus, and we talked about the different sites of awesome and devastating (mostly devastaing) moments of our college careers.  As we reminisced, I said to her, "I just wish I could go back and tell myself, 'Reagan, why are you consciously choosing to be crazy?  To do things that are making you miserable?  STOP it!  This isn't working for you.'"  

I'm not one to advocate dwelling in regret, but I know from experience that human beings are apt to repeat the same mistakes.  Over and over and over.  I can see that pattern in my own life now, and I wish I would have picked up on it sooner.  

The great thing is, I love giving advice.  Anytime you want someone to fix you, let me know, because I'm super awesome at (sometimes) thinking I can.  In working with high school students and having lots of college-aged friends, I get to share my past experiences and provide guidance when asked (and often when not).  So if you were to inquire of me, 'Reagan, what are you glad you did/what would you have done differently?  In all your 23 years of wisdom, what are things you would suggest to a college student?' here is what I would say:



  • The "freshman dorm experience" isn't a myth.  Those crazy girls on your floor will probaby be some of your closest friends for the next 4 years.  Leave your door open.  Host a movie night.  Stay up until 2am playing Guitar Hero.  (Just don't do it every night.)


  • Yes, it will be like mating season during those first 2 weeks of your freshman fall semester.  No, you won't be able to enjoy a nice chat with your roommates in your dorm lobby without having to experience a pair (or 5 pairs) of lovebirds canoodling on the sofa(s) right next to you.  But that doesn't have to be you.  Enjoy the freedom of making friends with whomever you want, going wherever you want, and doing whatever you want for awhile.  Give it a semester.  Give it two.  Don't feel like something is wrong with you if you haven't found your potential forever friend right off the bat.  You'll be glad you have other friends later.


  • Choose at least one thing on campus to get really involved in.  Something you enjoy.  Something that will be worth your time.  And commit to it.  It will feel good to have "your people" -- those Gospel choir singers/social work club members/intramural flag football players -- with whom you can share memories and enjoy the same quirky things.  


  • The freshman 15/20/30?  Also not a myth.  As much as you can stand it, try to stay away from those daily late night pizza deliveries and the all-you-can-eat stir fry section in the dining hall.  No, you don't need 1 dessert per meal.  And it probably wouldn't kill you to take advantage of the FREE fitness center that's only a 2 minute walk from your dorm. 


  • Choose a semester in Australia over that guy you've been dating for only 2 months.  Choose China.  Choose England.  Choose anywhere -- because, remember, you will come back.  And you will have learned, lived through, and done things that may never be available to you again until you're an old, retired empty-nester.


  • Take chances.  Make mistakes.  But if they just aren't working for you after the 2nd, 6th, or 26th time, STOP MAKING THEM.


  • Get involved in something outside the university bubble.  Volunteer at a local church.  Spend a summer as a camp counselor.  Make these years bigger than you.  


  • Build relationships with people who know what actual life is like (because, of course, college isn't anything like the real world). 


  • Get to know God.  Make your spiritual walk your own.  Go through a crisis of faith.  Ask a lot of questions.  Seek out answers.  Cry out to Him when you're at the end of yourself -- and experience a real, loving, personal relationship for what might be the first time.  Don't be afraid to learn that the religious professions of your parents -- the ones you've obviously believed your whole life -- might not be entirely correct.  But learn it around people who have been there too, who will love and encourage and counsel you when you need it.


Adventures in Missions gets this, too.  Watch this video for more words of wisdom... and to learn about Passport (formerly Real Life), a "mini-World Race" for college kids!


How about you?  What kinds of pointers would you give to a college student?

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Pray for Swaziland

A few of my fellow teammates decided to write a blog for each of our countries, focusing on specific prayer needs for each country.  My country of choice is, obviously, Swaziland.  (To see prayer blogs for the Phillippines, China, India, Nepal, Romania, Moldova, and South Africa, check out Jesse Morris, Rebecca Burger, and Leah Malone.)

Confession:  Pretty much all of this next part is straight plagiarism.  Except the prayer at the end - I could handle that all on my own.  The information comes from The Swaziland Partnership website, which is an organization founded by the pastor at Bethany First Church of the Nazarene (my home church) and the president at Southern Nazarene Univeristy in Bethany, OK.  The Swaziland Partnership was created to evaluate and take action against the many needs in Swaziland, which you'll see listed below.  BFC sends out several GO Teams (regular church people with a desire to serve) a year, which minister to the Swazi people through medicine, construction, teaching, and compassion.  (In fact, I've been in contact with the Director of Global Outreach, who coordinates the many aspects of the Swaziland Partnership, to see if we can team up with them in May.)  Check out their website for more information.  It's very informative.


Fast Facts About Swaziland:





  • Located in Southern Africa, between Mozambique and South Africa 



  • It is the smallest country in the Southern hemisphere (slightly smaller than New Jersey)



  • Population: 1,133,066


  • Age Structure:


    • 0-14 years: 40.3 %



    • 15-64 years: 56.1 %


    • 
65 years and older: 3.6%





  • Life Expectancy at birth: 32.23 years



  • Government: Monarchy
 (last monarchy in Africa!)


  • Capital: Mbabane



  • Gained independence from the UK in 1968



 
Below is a list of many of the needs for which we can pray. 
 
 
Water:
Half of the Swazi population does not have access to clean drinking water, with 60% of the boreholes (water wells) not in operation. The lack of water, and especially clean drinking water, is the source of immediate and long-term health issues with dehydration, water-borne diseases, and inadequate crop production.
 
Medicine:
Swaziland has a good system of hospitals and clinics throughout the country to serve their people. However, they do not have a continuing medical education system for their doctors and nurses to provide information on new research and methods.
 
Medical Equipment & Supplies:
The Swazi National Board Plan states the need for new and updated medical equipment and supplies for Raleigh Fitkin Memorial Hospital (RFM) and their 17 rural clinics. The staff is highly trained, but they need the tools to get the job done.
 
Construction:
RFM was built in the 1920s. Many of the 17 rural clinics were built in the 1930s and ‘40s. These original structures all need renovation. Many of these clinic communities do not have adequate housing for the nurses and their families. Some of the nurses are living in their clinic or in a storage facility nearby. For some, their families live in another city due to lack of housing. It is difficult to keep nurses in these rural communities when there is such inadequate housing.


 
The Church of the Nazarene continues to plant churches and needs new church facilities. Most congregations will have enough funds to lay a foundation or build the walls, but are not able to finish construction.
 
Compassion:
There are not enough hospitals or hospices to contain the number of people with AIDS. Many of these people are dying in their own homes.
 
Education:
Swaziland has three colleges of higher education with trained and talented staff. What they are requesting is continuing education for medical professionals, pastors, and those on the frontlines of AIDS care.
 
Community Vegetable Gardens:
The United Nations ranks Swaziland #4 in the world for food security issues–which means that starvation may soon outpace AIDS as the #1 killer in Swaziland.
 
AIDS:
We were appalled that over 289,000 were killed in the Indian Ocean tsunami in late 2004, in a matter of minutes by monstrous waves. Yet, there is an AIDS tsunami every month as over 289,000 die in Sub-Saharan Africa from AIDS.  Swaziland has the highest HIV infection rate in the world at 42%.
 
There is great social stigma to the admission of AIDS. Many communities will ostracize the person and their family if they are found to be HIV positive.
 
AIDS Orphans and Vulnerable Children
:
“Over 12 million children in Africa are orphaned due to the HIV/AIDS pandemic. 134 million children do not have access to education. 91 million children are living daily with debilitating hunger and an estimated one million children enter the commercial sex trade every year in order to survive.”  From Nazarene Compassionate Ministries


 
Experts say that Swaziland will have 200,000 AIDS orphans by 2012, which is 20% of their current population. There are many other vulnerable children in Swaziland. These children may have only one parent or may be living with a grandmother or aunt. They may even be cared for by an older sibling as there are 15,000 households led by children.
 
Swazi children must pay for their primary and high school education. College education is paid for by the government. To attend school, families must purchase the school uniform, black school shoes, textbooks, and school supplies. Thousands of children do not get the opportunity to go to school. Many families sacrifice all that they have by working jobs in other cities or countries to pay for their children’s education. The Swazi government just offered free education for grades 1 and 2 this year. While this is an excellent start, they do not have enough teachers or schools to accept everyone who came on registration day. Many were turned away.


 
There are Gogos (grandmothers) who have lost their children to AIDS and are caring for multiple grandchildren. There are pastors’ families caring for additional vulnerable children from their community in their homes. Many of these pastors cannot afford to send their own children to school. Some pastors have to choose which of their children they can send to school since they cannot afford to send them all. It is a terrible decision to have to make.


God, we lift up this country.  The needs seem endless, impossible to overcome.  And they are - for us.  But thank You that You are greater than our need.  In our weakness, Your grace is made perfect.  Feed the hungry.  Give water to the thirsty.  Teach those who are eager to learn.  Build the house for the workers whose trust is in You.  Clothe the naked.  Care for the orphan.  Do it through us.  Use us as the answer to our own prayer, as Your hands and feet.  We love You.  Help us to love others as You love us and more than we love ourselves.  In Jesus' Name, amen.